I found “Help Lord — the Devil Wants Me Fat” so stay tuned for the next instalment on that front. But in the mean time, here are a couple of options for taking a positive approach to your weight loss.
Via Jesus Needs New PR.
And Jogging With Jesus, another book from the Devil Wants Me Fat author.
Preaching from the iPad is such a great justification for buying one. I’ve said that since day one. I want to write an iphone program (though I have no talent) that functions as an autocue controller for text on an iPad. Autocue controllers are traditionally knobs that twist either sitting in the hands of a newsreader (that’s what they were at ABC online when I had a job interview/audition there a bunch of years ago) or the producer (that’s what they were when I was reading the news for QUT News on Bris 31 when I was at uni).
Anyway, that’s a digression. If you’re already ahead of the curve you’ll want one of these iPad lecterns so that you can preach the gospel unhindered, like Paul at the end of Acts.
From Little Mountain Productions, via PastorGear.
Sitting in church history today trying to grapple with the different figures from the early centuries of the church I thought “wouldn’t it be great to have trading cards of figures in church history” I was all set to start blogging them in the lead up to exams, when I decided to google it. It seems someone else has had the idea and is going to actually produce them. They’re doing theologians more broadly.
But I will not be deterred. So coming soon, in the spirit of Ben’s Jane Ayre trading cards, will be the St. Eutychus (and Andrew Bain) guide to historical figures. I’m also going to venn diagram heretical views of the trinity. Because everybody likes a good Venn diagram.
On my way to college today I was listening to Queensland Treasurer Andrew Fraser in a regular Friday morning slot he has on ABC radio with his opposition equivalent.
For those not living in Queensland, or disinterested in the comings and goings of our political scene, our politicians emerged from a crisis meeting about the unpopularity of our government with one new “policy.” Our Premier has ordered her minions to “walk a mile” in the shoes of Queensland’s constituents. She wants her MPs to spend a couple of days in the real world. Working real jobs.
Basically the whole thing is being portrayed as an extended photo opp. Which it currently is. There’s an assumption amongst our political class that being seen on a construction site wearing a fluorescent vest and a helmet wins votes. And it certainly links government policies with job creation.
But I propose a novel idea for the Bligh Government. Being in touch with the people is a valuable thing. I think there is some merit to this exercise. But if the government wants this to not be written off as a vacuous PR exercise they should ban the cameras, and do no media interviews about the experience. They should each be allowed to make a speech to parliament about their experience and changes they think should emerge from working with real people. But that should be it. A media blackout. No interviews. No contrived photo opportunities. No interrupting a real person’s work day for the sake of the 15 seconds it’ll buy on the news. That is how to make this a positive PR exercise not a negative one. The people you’re imposing yourself on don’t need to be treated like performing monkeys who happen to specialise in working a real job.
That is all.
What would events in world history look like in Facebook updates? Sadly these are just one block image and not separate ones. But they’re very funny. From Cool Material.
Apparently you can. Glen McCracken is taking on Modern Warfare 2, attempting to reach level 70 without killing anybody. He’s been going for a while, he’s up to level 21.
“Along with his astonishing zero kills, Glen has died 1,339 times. I caught up with gaming’s favorite pacifistic player, and although he admits that “things are already starting to slow down,” he remains positive. “With my Tactical Insertion and smoke grenade combo, I’m getting more points than ever,” Glen says confidently.”
Modern Warfare is a team game – and while you’d think having a player deliberately not killing people would be an impediment to team success – he has a winning record.
“Glen isn’t killing anyone, but how are his point grabbing techniques affecting his teams? Apparently, you’ll want him by your side. Glen has a winning record. He has 62 wins and 52 loses so far.”
Letters of Note. If you’re not reading it already. Do yourself a favour.
Here’s a letter from a Japanese kamikaze pilot to his children.
“Even though you can’t see me, I’ll always be watching you. When you grow up, follow the path you like and become a fine Japanese man and woman. Do not envy the fathers of others. Your father will become a god and watch you two closely. Both of you, study hard and help out your mother with work. I can’t be your horse to ride, but you two be good friends. I am a cheerful person who flew a large bomber and finished off all the enemy. Please be an unbeatable person like your father and avenge my death.”
A bit chilling. A bit sad. Very interesting. Imagine growing up with that letter in the place of one of your parents.
You’ll find it easier to get away from the old school “friend” you didn’t really like all that much next time you bump into them thanks to this, the four levels of social entrapment, identifying these situations is half the battle. Sometimes they happen at supermarkets, so you can probably start ordering your groceries online to avoid that one, sometimes they happen while you’re sitting in a cafe – which is why I make my coffee at home. Unfortunately, that leads to people dropping around unannounced, just for coffee.
Conversely, if you would like to catch up with your old friends in a meaningful way (and Facebook isn’t “meaningful” or “catching up”) then there are some typically awkward conversations to avoid.
There is, of course, the fifth social entrapment in church circles – which involves obligation, it looks like going to working bees and joining committees, and awkward conversations with new people where you ask them what they do and then talk about the weather.
Perhaps a solution to all of these problems is to work at having interesting things to say and to ask people about that extend past the weather, last night’s dinner and your job.
h/t Mikey.
I’m bringing back the link post. Huzzah. I turned the plugin on, and ran it, and below are some posts I shared via Google Reader in the last four weeks or so. These will be daily and will feature stuff from around the interwebs that I’ve enjoyed but not posted independently.
How long until somebody starts selling this concept properly produced?
All you need to do next is scrawl “ctrl + c” on your photocopier.
From here.
I don’t want a pickle. I just want to write with these pencil stickles. They come with an inscription based on a statement that musician Woodie Guthrie (also famous for being the father of Arlo Guthrie, the Motorcycle Song writer) inscribed on his guitar.1
1 I do realise that Woodie is much more famous than Arlo. Just as Bob is more famous than Jakob.
Well, the Mexican entries seem to have dried up. If you want to enter this amazing competition, in order to win a not so amazing Mexican prize – then please email me your Mexican man by tomorrow. Then I’ll throw open some sort of voting process, and announce a winner next week sometime.
If you haven’t entered the competition because you’re worried that the man, who you don’t know, might not approve, then let me soothe your conscience with these two emails that I received this week. The first is from the guy who asked me to “make him a Mexican” the second is from the Mexican man’s wife.
“This has been the funniest set of events that I have ever experienced! The face behind the burrito and the naked guy laying in the pile of Doritos is priceless. Keep sending me updates. All of my colleagues are getting kicks out of this.”
“Hi
I am the guy’s wife and this is hilarious!!!! A job well done by you and your friends. Thanks for making us laugh.”
Here’s the guy we’re Mexicanising.
If you’ve made a Mexican and don’t know how to submit it – send me an email to the gmail address linked in the header.
You can get a bin full of your ashes in a 45… that’s the best intro I could come up with for this post, and if you remember a Cornershop song from the late 90s (possibly), and know that the 45 refers to the 45rpms a conventional 7 inch record had to be played at to produce music as intended, then you’ll think it’s brilliant.
I’ve posted, in the past, some creative way to ensure your ashes stay on in a really novel way. You can become a set of pencils, or a diamond ring, or an urn shaped like your head, if that’s not your cup of tea (though it might be Keith Richards’), you can get ashes mixed with tattoo ink, and now, thanks to “And Vinyly” you can become a final vinyl. They’ll cast your ashes into the mix, and cut you a bunch of records of your favourite song to be distributed to your friends and loved ones. Or perhaps your enemies.
You can even record a message. Backmasking is a real possibility. I’d get the Beatles Revolution 9 recorded backwards on my album – so that you’d hear “turn me on deadman” in the normal direction, and atonal LSD inspired experimental music (it’s not my favourite Beatles song) in reverse. You can set the record straight on any long running family feuds. You can dig the needle in just one last time… the puns, and possibilities, are endless.
Wired has a story. Here’s a quote about the process.
“How does it work? The process of setting human ashes into vinyl involves a very understanding pressing plant. Basically the ashes must be sprinkled onto the raw piece of vinyl (known as a “biscuit” or “puck”) before it is pressed by the plates. This means that when the plates exert their pressure on the vinyl in order to create the grooves, the ashes are pressed into the record.”
What songs would you pick?
Apparently, if you slow Justin Bieber down to 12.5% speed he sounds a lot like ambient avante garde noise act Sigur Ros. Who have considerably more social cachet.
J. BIEBZ – U SMILE 800% SLOWER by Shamantis
But it doesn’t work in reverse.