Tetris quilt keeps you warm and in the right place

If you’re struggling to lie in just the right spot this grid like Tetris blanket will help

Ox off to the Bulls

Manly Captain Matt Orford is heading to England to play for the Bradford Bulls.

He led us to successive grand finals and won us a premiership.

But he has a crap kicking game.

I’d say I’m ambivalent about this piece of news.

Ironic Venn Diagram

Having dangerously used the word irony in a post today – and fearing the horde of angry pedants who swarm onto any use of the word irony they deem inappropriate – I made this graph on graphjam.

Here is what wikipedia has to say on the matter – that may provide some clarity…

Modern theories of rhetoric distinguish between verbal, dramatic and situational irony.

  • Verbal irony is a disparity of expression and intention: when a speaker says one thing but means another, or when a literal meaning is contrary to its intended effect. An example of this is sarcasm.
  • Dramatic irony is a disparity of expression and awareness: when words and actions possess a significance that the listener or audience understands, but the speaker or character does not.
  • Situational irony is the disparity of intention and result: when the result of an action is contrary to the desired or expected effect. Likewise, cosmic irony is disparity between human desires and the harsh realities of the outside world (or the whims of the gods). By some definitions, situational irony and cosmic irony are not irony at all.

And in case you’re confused between sarcasm and verbal irony – because both have the same functional definition – here’s a helpful contrast.

Ridicule is an important aspect of sarcasm, but not verbal irony in general.

T-Shirt Appreciation Day: Guilty Secrets

So… umm… is this you?

Would you feel vicariously unclean knowing that a post you were reading was composed in such a manner?

Confess your blogging sins in T-Shirt form for just $22.95.

T-Shirt Appreciation Day: A shirt you can count on

It’s an abacus. Get it.

No really, get it for $25USD.

T-Shirt Appreciation Day: Irony explained

If you can’t get irony literarily right then at least you can get it literally right.

This one is $18.95USD.

T-Shirt Appreciation Day: Irrational fear of sleeping

Unless you’re a little yellow almost-circle you can probably sleep soundly knowing that these ghosts won’t eat you. They don’t eat any of the fruit or the little golden orbs now do they?

This one is $26.50USD.

T-Shirt Appreciation Day: Stop evolving

Yeah. Cop that Neanderthal man. This one is $20.95USD.

T-Shirt Appreciation Day – Love is Colourblind

T-Shirt Appreciation Day: Shirts and blogs

I’m calling today “T-Shirt Appreciation Day” because I have a bunch of shirts to post and “Shirt of the Day” works questionably if I’m posting more than one shirt a day…

Now, onto the show…

Buy this one for $19. It’s a hard truth, but a truth no less.

Choose your own adventure – easier with a map

I loved Choose Your Own Adventure books as a young’un. Though, being a Campbell, I was a pretty bad cheat and used to do them backwards after a couple of frustrating deaths.

Perhaps I would have made better choices had I studied the structure of the books in depth. Like this person has.

In scanning over the distribution of colors in this plot, one clear pattern is a the gradual decline in the number of endings. The earliest books (in the top row) are awash in reds and oranges, with a healthy number of ‘winning’ endings mixed in. Later cyoa books tended to favor a single ‘best’ ending (see CYOA 44 & 53).

And here’s something I did not know, and indeed it contains a life lesson for those of us who like to cheat…

The one outlier is the catastrophic ending seen in the third row from the bottom. This was a punishment page that could only be reached by cheating. Unlike most other endings in the book it does not offer to let you continue the story from a few pages back but instead calls you a cheater and leaves you with no choice but to start over from the beginning.

Apparently the books evolved to become more difficult over time. As indicated by this graph…

Read the rest of the research. It’s interesting.

Strawman

Heaven-o

You wouldn’t read about it in the papers. A guy is trying to get “hello” removed from the lexicon.

The perfect mug for instant coffee drinkers

If you’re going to drink crap you might as well drink it from a toilet

Reporting for duty

I’ve put together a few tips for helping husbands/wives to survive the report writing process.

For the report writer.

1. Balance your time. We all know that report writing isn’t fun for you, but don’t forget that it’s no fun for your spouse either. Make sure you spend some quality time with them as well.

2. Encourage your spouse to use some of his/her free time to do the things he/she enjoys but you don’t. For Nathan it’s playing playstation.

3. Don’t slack off on your commitments. Again, this has to do with the balance thing. Fair enough, don’t take on any extra commitments, but don’t slack off on the ones you’ve already committed to.

4. 80% is good enough. I haven’t mastered this one yet but I’m trying. Apparently the theory is that near enough is good enough. We don’t have to be perfect all of the time.

5. Sleep and eat properly. This goes without saying.

For the spouse…

1.  Be patient and understand that the work needs to be done at home and outside of regular work hours.

2. By flowers and chocolate. Frequently.

3. Try to provide a healthy dose of perspective.

4. Be prepared to get your hands dirty and do some marking.

5. Find something to occupy yourself for 72 hours. Nathan recommends a PS3.