Stop Bible Bashing, use a Witness Stick
This Trademarked Stick will help you convince your friends that Jesus is Lord. Just like Moses used a staff to convince Pharaoh that God is God.
It’s a real thing, but it doesn’t have an official website. Just the trademark registration page which includes this description:
“The WITNESS STICK trademark is filed in the category of Furniture Products . The description provided to the USPTO for WITNESS STICK is Non-metal poles that have been carved and painted and used for educational purposes.”