Nine year old Alex Greven is putting out a self help book for guys called “How to talk to girls”. Advice from a nine year old with no experience may be a bitter pill to swallow. But here are some quotes from Alex (via the SMH)
On brains v brawn
“You want the girl to notice you,” he writes. “But you don’t want to draw too much attention to yourself or she will think you are a crazy madman who doesn’t even know where his brain is.”
He says it is important not to be a show-off.
But it is good to be the smartest boy in the class, because “girls will be prowling at your feet”.
“Comb your hair and don’t wear sweats. Control your hyperness (cut down on the sugar if you have to). Don’t act desperate.”
On pretty girls
He warned boys to be wary of “pretty girls”.
“It is easy to spot pretty girls because they have big earrings, fancy dresses and all the jewellery … pretty girls are like cars that need a lot of oil,” he writes in chapter three.
“Sometimes, you get a girl to like you, then she ditches you. Life is hard, move on!”
“Or sometimes it doesn’t work out. I had a crush on a girl in preschool. Then my family had to move, so I had to let her wash out of my mind.”
“About 73 per cent of regular girls ditch boys; 98 per cent of pretty girls ditch boys.”
“If you do get a girl to like you, that is victory. Winning victory is a dream for most boys, but it is very rare.”
The boy is clearly a genius.
iTunes 8’s genius feature is brilliant. I hearts it, I do. It’s house cleaning time. I picked Yves St Klein’s “Polka” the song from that ad with people throwing stuff in the car from their second story window. And I get the following: