Get yourself in the groove. Literally.

You can get a bin full of your ashes in a 45… that’s the best intro I could come up with for this post, and if you remember a Cornershop song from the late 90s (possibly), and know that the 45 refers to the 45rpms a conventional 7 inch record had to be played at to produce music as intended, then you’ll think it’s brilliant.

I’ve posted, in the past, some creative way to ensure your ashes stay on in a really novel way. You can become a set of pencils, or a diamond ring, or an urn shaped like your head, if that’s not your cup of tea (though it might be Keith Richards’), you can get ashes mixed with tattoo ink, and now, thanks to “And Vinyly” you can become a final vinyl. They’ll cast your ashes into the mix, and cut you a bunch of records of your favourite song to be distributed to your friends and loved ones. Or perhaps your enemies.

You can even record a message. Backmasking is a real possibility. I’d get the Beatles Revolution 9 recorded backwards on my album – so that you’d hear “turn me on deadman” in the normal direction, and atonal LSD inspired experimental music (it’s not my favourite Beatles song) in reverse. You can set the record straight on any long running family feuds. You can dig the needle in just one last time… the puns, and possibilities, are endless.

Wired has a story. Here’s a quote about the process.

“How does it work? The process of setting human ashes into vinyl involves a very understanding pressing plant. Basically the ashes must be sprinkled onto the raw piece of vinyl (known as a “biscuit” or “puck”) before it is pressed by the plates. This means that when the plates exert their pressure on the vinyl in order to create the grooves, the ashes are pressed into the record.”

What songs would you pick?

The only good toy cat…

Sadly, as far as I can tell, this isn’t a real toy but a work of art.

I found this particular dead cat at BoingBoing.

I would buy one, I’d also buy some of the previously featured roadkill toys that are sold on this website.

Splodge the hedgehog is great for those people hanging out for the results of my pathos laden letter to K-Rudd. He’s also great for those people wanting to traumatise their children with a plush toy. And he’s completely consistent with my own experiences with the Australian echidna

All the trappings

The humble mouse trap has not really evolved in my lifetime – despite the complexity offered by the Rube Goldbergesque “Mouse Trap” board game.

This designer, Sarah Dery, obviously got sick of picking up dead mice…

There will be blood

The thing that always frustrated me about cartoons based on the perennial chase, the binary battle between good and evil, the constant game of cat and mouse – was that in every case (except perhaps for Itchy and Scratchy) – the poor innocent creature got away. Well, not in these beautifully conceived reworkings of classic cartoons

Roadkilling me softly

I love it when disparate topical threads get brought together into a thrilling conclusion. That’s why I like movies like Lock Stock so much – here’s a combination of two of my favourite things – macabre toys and roadkill.

Roadkill Plush Toys. That’s right. Cheer up your kiddy (or your inner kiddy) with the thought that things could be much worse.

“Grind (Rabbit) Plush Toy

* He measures a healthy 12 inches from the tip of his twitching nose to his outstretched back paws, and 5 inches across the widest part of his body. His fluffy bunny ears add another 5 inches to his length. One is half-cocked vertically upwards, the other lies flat on the ground. In the middle he squishes out to 3 inches high with the blood and guts stuffed in, and 2 inches high with them out. He weighs a piffling 1.6 kilos. He won’t be the first to admit it, but as his modest dimensions show he was the runt of the litter. A litter which stretched to 211 brothers and sisters.

Splodge (Hedgehog) Plush Toy

* He measures a statuesque 23 cms from nose to tail, and 21 cms from outstretched paw to paw. And in the middle he flattens out to 13 cms high with the blood and guts stuffed in, and 11 cms high with them out. At 300 grams he’s slightly overweight for a hedgehog. This is due to his unhealthy obsession with bread and milk.

Twitch (Raccoon) Plush Toy

* He measures a healthy 15 inches from nose to tail, and 10 inches from outstretched paw to paw. And in the middle he flattens out to 2 inches high with the blood and guts stuffed in, and 1 inch high with them out. He weighs a piffling 350 grams. He won’t be the first to admit it, but as his modest dimensions show he was the runt of the litter.”

Good yarn

What is it with Etsy users and macabre toys? I can’t complain too much – they’re great blog fodder… sadly this particular item is sold out, but there are other similar products available.

Found here.

Little trophy of bunny homicide


Little sister number 2 also suggested I post this. Again, from etsy, another piece of macabre crochet work.

Toy story

A while back I posted a link to a macabre series of toys. I just found the source of said toys and there are some beauties. I wish they were either for sale of came with knitting patterns – but for now enjoy.

knit picking

I have never wanted to learn to knit as much as I do now. Thanks to this collection of macabre toys.

Bad case of carroted artery

Bad case of carroted artery