Power to the people

David Thorne didn’t like his latest electricity bill. Which involved an inexplicable $600ish increase. He tried his best to come up with reasons for the jump in a series of emails with his electricity company. In these emails he claimed to have been experimenting on alternative sources for energy.

He seems like a funny guy.

“As every meter reading for the last two years at this address has been under two hundred dollars, rather than pay you $766.05, I would prefer to spend that amount on thirty eight pizzas, ensuring sufficient fat reserves to survive having the heat turned off, or have my apartment lined with polyester socks and wear a suit made out of carpet – possibly generating enough power to start my own grid company. I would then construct a number, calculate an amount based on this and send out accounts stating that the amount is based on a number and is therefore mathematically correct. If anyone questioned the basis of the number the amount is calculated from, I would simply declare “I have the power” and point out the scientific implausibility of their experiments, forcing them to investigate other, more viable, designs.”

But we already knew that.