Author: Nathan Campbell

Nathan runs St Eutychus. He loves Jesus. His wife. His daughter. His son. His other daughter. His dog. Coffee. And the Internet. He is the pastor of City South Presbyterian Church, a church in Brisbane, a graduate of Queensland Theological College (M. Div) and the Queensland University of Technology (B. Journ). He spent a significant portion of his pre-ministry-as-a-full-time-job life working in Public Relations, and now loves promoting Jesus in Brisbane and online. He can't believe how great it is that people pay him to talk and think about Jesus. If you'd like to support his writing financially you can do that by giving to his church.

Food Nirvana

Caffeine. Check.

Bacon. Check.

Maple Syrup. Check.

Lollipop. Check.

All in one delicious morsel. Check, check, check, check this out…

Caffeinated bacon and maple flavoured lollipops. For sale. For real.

I’m a Millennial

Did you know? And if you’re born after Gen X then you are too.

Some demographer has decided to make things very confusing for Christians. By using the label “Millennial” to describe people in Gen Y. I guess that makes all you Gen Xers pre-Millennials, and people who choose to bag out age based demographics must be pan-Millennials.

This article was the source of my confusion: Pastor Mark Driscoll: Millennials are Honest on Faith

I thought it was somewhat misleading.

Some reflections on violence in the Old Testament

I’m writing an essay at the moment on the following: Violence, Joshua, and the Christian. Quite apart from the fact that literary criticism of the Old Testament means we have no real sense of who wrote Joshua or when it was written, the question of what role the violence plays in the narrative is vexing. Did the Israelites actually carry out God mandated genocide of those in Canaan? And if they did, is that really a problem?

I’m going with no, and no.

Is God ordering genocide a problem?

Tackling the second question first – I have no problem with God carrying out judgment on his creation. The earth is his, and everything in it. If we all deserve death, and God is infinite, then who are we to quibble about the timing and manner of the inevitable and deserved end we face. Because death is the punishment for sin we’re all essentially facing genocide at that point.

The Canaanites were by all accounts particularly wicked people whose practices were frowned on by those in the nations around them (let alone God) their practices included incest, bestiality, child sacrifice and a fairly murderous militant culture. Presence in the promised land – for the Israelites – depended on them acting rightly, but their entrance into the land was due to the occupants acting wickedly.

Other people have a major problem with this notion – one scholar goes so far as to suggest that commands to kill the Canaanites came from Satan and the Israelites were too theologically illiterate to be able to tell the difference. Richard Dawkins calls the God of the Old Testament the nastiest character in fiction. Another school of thought thinks the violent rhetoric was just a tool to help Israel establish some (rather late – in the time of King Josiah) national identity. Which brings us to the second question.

Did the Israelites carry out genocide on the Canaanites?

No. They didn’t. They certainly killed some Canaanites as they moved into the promised land – but these would appear to be those Canaanites who stayed to pit their might against the people of God. Rahab’s little dialogue with the Jewish spies suggests the Canaanites knew full well what was coming. They had plenty of time to leave (forty years of wilderness wandering for the Jews). And God’s promises of possession for Israel were almost always coupled with a promise to “drive the people out” with only those who remained destined for destruction. This was not genocide – it was the destruction of a national identity. An identity that was synonymous with evil and loathed by the surrounding nations. We also see plenty of Canaanites appearing throughout the Old Testament after they’re meant to be wiped out. Clearly no genocide actually occured.

So what do we make of the commands for genocide then?

What I’m sure of is that we can dismiss the idea that these commands were somehow Satanic misdirection. Ordering the punishment of death for sin is completely consistent with God’s character in the New Testament. If we’re going to go with the notion of one God in both books – not a bipolar happy God/angry God then we need to read these passages in the light of Romans 3:23 and Romans 6:23 – we all sin, and thus we all deserve death. The Canaanites were no exception.

There is some merit in seeing the book of Joshua as some sort of identity building missive for the nation of Israel – an answer to the question of why they are God’s people living in a land God promised. At that point the theory that the language of violent conquest was a common sociological phenom is useful, but I don’t think it’s the primary purpose, because that essentially removes the need for some form of historical conquest, and doesn’t actually explain Israel’s presence in the land.

Questions about the historicity of a complete and total conquest – and people do ask those questions – are a bit silly, because Joshua demonstrates, in the narrative, that the conquest was neither complete or total. But it also shows Israel occupying the promised land – alongside those they were meant to wipe out.

The question I keep asking when I come back to passages like this is what theological purpose does it serve? I think this is my rubric for assessing every passage in the Bible, it comes before the question of “what historical fact does this teach”… and so, when I read Gary Millar’s commentary on Deuteronomy (Now Choose Life) I resonate more with his treatment of the issue than with the sociological view (Sociological readers of the Bible seem to have an incredibly low view of God’s sovereignty or ability to intervene – interpreting theological writings by looking for natural causes seems dumb to me. They almost always dismisses any miraculous intervention from God in establishing any identity – Israel’s identity, in their view, stems from their own self identity rather than from identity through God’s election). Millar even goes so far as to suggest some rabbinic hyperbole. Which is one of my favourite expresssions… here is his commentary on the instructions in Deuteronomy to wipe out the Canaanites (so that the Israelites may stay true to God. If they fail the author clearly says the Canaanites will lead the Israelites astray).

“This is theological preaching, urging Israel on to wholehearted obedience. In this context we should expect some hyperbole, at least.”

He argues that the Hebrew word הרמ (I can’t figure out how to do a final מ on my keyboard) – or herem – is a pointer to the theological nature of this destruction. Israel is to wipe out the idolatrous practices of the Canaanites, and their identity, rather than the people themselves.

Millar says:

“The intensification of the command to disposses the nations to destruction is not primarily about warfare at all. It is a theological conviction, arising from recognition that the Canaanites will be a snare in the land; their influence must be purged from the land if Israel is to survive.”

Deuteronomy 7 itself points to this sort of interpretation. Verse 1 says God will drive the nations out ahead of Israel, verse 2 that he will deliver them and the Israelites “completely destroy them” (that’s that Hebrew word), and verses 3-5 are instructions for what to do with the survivors (ie don’t marry them or worship their Gods). Why are there instructions for dealing with the survivors if they are to be completely wiped out?

Millar again:

“Throughout this chapter, it is clear that the Mosaic Preaching is concerned to bring the Israelites to the conviction that shattering the structures of Canaanite society is a theological necessity. This is expressed not in terms of driving out or dispossessing the Canaanites, but of destroying them.”

Regarding further instructions about the Canaanites in Deuteronomy 20 Millar acknowledges that the “leave no survivors” command is “startlingly literal” – but again suggests that the instructions are not simply about military victory but the annihilation of a way of life.

In the case of the Canaanites it seems the adage of “hate the sin, love the sinner” can’t really be carried out – because the two can’t be separated.

Super Mario Origins

Ever wondered how Mario got his name? No? Well now you know, a real estate baron in Seattle is an undercover 8-bit plumber.

Mario A. Segale, real estate developer, was indeed the namesake of Nintendo’s Mario character, and he was indeed the landlord of Nintendo’s Tukwila, Washington warehouse in 1981 when employees of the then very small Nintendo of America named the protagonist in Donkey Kong after him. Many details beyond that still remain in the realm of speculation and will remain so unless the parties involved talk to the press in more detail (and reporters do their part by reporting it accurately).

This is what he looked like in high school.

http://technologizer.files.wordpress.com/2010/04/segale_large.jpg

You know this thanks to this rather detailed Technologizer article.

Blog envy

Simone’s blog turned two yesterday. I didn’t realise it was that young. They grow up so fast. Then, Ben, my favourite blogger (he drew my logo – amongst other awesome things) called her blog his favourite. Now I have blogger envy. I’m seriously considering campaigning to become his favourite blog. Maybe I should start a book group. Maybe a book group aiming to go through Penguin’s Good Book series – which, incidentally, are heaps cheaper on the Book Depository – I ordered about 20 of them the other day for under $70)…

What must I do Ben?

How to give Melbourne something to play for

So the Storm are thinking about appealing the decision to not allow them to earn points this season. Fair enough. I have an idea that will add drama to the Storm’s season and give them something to play for. Put them on negative 30 points. Let them play for the standard two points per game. But make it double or nothing. If they don’t reach 0 points by the end of the year, kick them out.

Guide to writing good fiction

I’ve never written more than a chapter of fiction (I have about 20 first chapters though if anybody wants to buy some). I always get stuck on giving good names to characters. Plot devices aren’t all that hard, there are only six plots afterall, and a limited number of twists. And character development (except for the elusive name) doesn’t phase me. The final piece of the writing puzzle is reaching an audience. You do this by being popular. Here’s a quick guide to popularity from XKCD.

Fiction Rule of Thumb

Tolkien, Shakespeare and Lewis Carroll get an exemption in the alt text.

Mark Driscoll ruined Facebook

I thoroughly enjoy Mark Driscoll’s ministry. I once flew 1600km to Brisbane to see him (when I lived in Townsville). I’ve downloaded plenty of sermons, and I subscribe to both his blog and the Resurgence blog that duplicates his posts. For a while the phrase “Mark Driscoll Fanboy” has returned my site in the first page of results on Google. In short, I am well qualified to make this assessment.

Mark Driscoll ruined Facebook. For everybody. John Piper may have ruined Twitter with his unabashed holiness – Mark Driscoll has ruined Facebook with his unabashed all round awesomeness – there isn’t an area of life that Mark Driscoll isn’t better than you at, nor one that he is not qualified to give you advice in. He is, of course, the model preacher, husband, father and man. Here are some of his status updates – each prompting an almost frenzied response from his legion of fans.

The Preacher

Mark Driscoll prepares his sermons in less than two hours while watching TV.

The Husband

The Father

His children are more perfect (in every way) than yours.


The Man

He goes to hardware stores. Like real men do…

He’s funnier than you. Even in puerile ways.

And you’ve got to wonder how often his status updates – that go to more than 50,000 fans – are “targeted”…

If you can’t read any of the text in those images click through to them on Picasa – these are all recent status updates from Pastor Mark’s fanpage.

Are you feeling inadequate?

Cool tech news

Sometimes I’m a mega geeky fanboy. Two things have me pretty excited.

The Amiga is coming back. That’s so retro awesome. We’re not talking about emulators. But the real deal.

Android is now on the iPhone. Also cool.

Thorney hijinks

These David Thorne specials made me laugh. He’s the spider drawing guy…

In this one he takes on a school chaplain (Thorne is an atheist) who sent out a parental permission form for a dramatic Easter presentation from the local uniting church with the “yes” box already ticked. Thorne recounts his own experience in a church play.

I was actually in a Bible based play once and played the role of ‘Annoyed about having to do this.’ My scene involved offering a potplant, as nobody knew what Myrrh was, to a plastic baby Jesus then standing between ‘I forgot my costume so am wearing the teachers poncho’ and ‘I don’t feel very well’. Highlights of the play included a nervous donkey with diarrhoea causing ‘I don’t feel very well’ to vomit onto the back of Mary’s head, and the lighting system, designed to provide a halo effect around the manger, overheating and setting it alight. The teacher, later criticised for dousing an electrical fire with a bucket of water and endangering the lives of children, left the building in tears and the audience in silence. We only saw her again briefly when she came to the school to collect her poncho.

In this one he tenders his resignation after his boss asks him to produce a speech about graphic design for a school. There’s a language warning on both articles. Here’s a bit of a crash course in graphic design though…

And that is what graphic design and branding is about; when the client asks you to fit eighteen pages of text onto a single sided A4 flyer and increase the type size to twelve point, simply find your special place and dance. It doesn’t matter if there is no music; create the rhythm by clapping, humming or building a musical instrument using tightly drawn string and a cardboard box. A stick with bottle tops nailed to it does not count as a musical instrument. Nobody wants to hear that. I usually tap out No Sleep Till Brooklyn by the Beastie Boys with spoons but it comes down to personal preference and implement availability.

In this one he demonstrates that bees are attracted to yellow while not test driving a new motorbike that he doesn’t want. And he, I believe, fooled some people into thinking that McDonalds purposefully leave items out of drive through bags

I have been researching bees on the internet for the last four hours at work. When I type “Do bees like yellow” into google, it states that there are 2,960,000 results. It will take me a while to look at that many pages so I doubt I will make it in there today.
One of the pages states that Qantas once had a yellow kangaroo as their logo but when it was painted on the tail fin it attracted nests of bees so the logo was changed to red in the mid fifties. This would seem to support the argument that bees are indeed attracted to yellow and contradicts what you have told me. Admittedly though, another page states that bees are technically unable to fly due to their wings being too small for their body weight but I have seen them doing it so this can’t be true – somebody should check the internet and make sure everything on there is correct.
Regardless, I do not think having to dodge bees in addition to the already present dangers of learning to ride a motorbike for the first time would be very safe. Once when I was a passenger in a yellow taxi, a bee flew in and I screamed causing the driver to swerve and hit a wheelie bin. I will continue my research and confirm that this would not be a factor before I arrange the test ride.

Biblical gangsters

We’re working through 2 Samuel at church at the moment, during Bible Study on Wednesday I was struck by the thought that the book reads like a gangster novel (I’ve read quite a few, I consider myself an expert). There’s a touch of Arthurian legend about David and his champion (Joab) and Saul and his (Abner).

Someone ought to use the narrative structure of Samuel 2 to write a mafia drama. In chapter 2 there’s this cool scene where Saul’s Capo (Mafia for captain) Abner decides that Ish-Bosheth will take over running Saul’s family.

Then Saul’s family meets David’s family for a bit of a discussion (2:12-13), family enforcers Abner and Joab decide to let the up and comers earn their bones – and twelve of the men knife each other (2:14).

Then Abner whacks Joab’s brother (2:13). But David’s family gets more powerful, and people stop paying tribute to Saul’s gang (3:1). Before long, Abner falls out with his Godfather and wants to switch families after an argument about some broad (3:6-21). Joab doesn’t like this, so tricks him, and sends him to sleep with the fishes. His Don (David) doesn’t like this (3:22-38).

Ish-Bosheth goes to the (metaphorical) mattresses, but two of his capos betray him, killing him on his (literal) mattress. David whacks them (4:1-12).

And the rest of the book plays out a bit like the Godfather, David, like Michael Corleone, comes to power, has to deal with the betrayal of a family member, the jostling for power of his “family”, while taking over the kingdom of his predecessor.

Who says the Old Testament can’t be fun…

Classified posters

A bunch of designers were challenged to find, and redesign, classified adverts from their local rags. The finished products will be auctioned for charity. Here’s a sample.

Tetris Purgatory

If this was Tetris Hell (because you can’t get a line at all) – then this is Tetris Purgatory. It’s called Hateris, and it gives players the least useful piece available.

BlackStar Coffee

I’ve been meaning to get along to BlackStar Coffee in West End for ages. A couple of Facebook friends talk about it incessantly.

Today was the day. I give their coffee a 9/10.

The best I’ve had in Brisbane. Ever. Though I haven’t tried Campos in Brisbane yet.

It’s on Thomas Street (off Vulture St).

Delicious. Full bodied. Velvety texture.

They roast on site, and I picked up some of their Colombian beans, also delicious.

Worst. Campaign Timing. Ever.

Skins, a sportswear company, was a sponsor of the Melbourne Storm until today. They’ve just launched a marketing campaign called “Cheat Legal”

Here’s the ad.

Guaranteed to be parodied in the next 12 hours I’d say…