That’s what I’d call anyone who carries this Swiss Army Knife featuring 110 “tools”. It doesn’t even fit in your pocket. Pretty much missing the whole “pocket knife” concept. I suspect you have to put the knife on the ground and throw whatever you want to chop at the blade.
Author: Nathan Campbell
Nathan runs St Eutychus. He loves Jesus. His wife. His daughter. His son. His other daughter. His dog. Coffee. And the Internet. He is the pastor of City South Presbyterian Church, a church in Brisbane, a graduate of Queensland Theological College (M. Div) and the Queensland University of Technology (B. Journ). He spent a significant portion of his pre-ministry-as-a-full-time-job life working in Public Relations, and now loves promoting Jesus in Brisbane and online. He can't believe how great it is that people pay him to talk and think about Jesus. If you'd like to support his writing financially you can do that by giving to his church.
Giant tool
Hitting the right note
If you’re more advanced than those who consider beans the musical fruit – but still not above a little bit of an orchestral performance in the bathroom then these toilet seats (priced at about $US169 each) are for you…
A salt and battery
This is a beautiful, hopefully pun inspired, piece of kitchen design. From this Turkish designer.
My New Friend part 2
Michel Roberts just rang me on the telephone at work. Which surprised me somewhat. He’s definitely a man.
He rang to see if I’d read his latest email. And to tell me that his life is in danger. I did read his email, and I don’t really care. Here are some highlights from the email.
“I want you to understand that I had bestowed my hope in you believing that you will not cheat me or seat on my fund once the security company deliver the consignment to your care. Therefore,you are to impose love, trust and confidence in me so that we shall achieve our aim. Mostly is trust because without trust that’s mean we are not making any progress,I have the believe that you are a God sent to me and also a God fearing person, and I think it will be nice for us to handle this by both of us because I don’t want someone else to know about the consignment in the security company.Please my dear lets keep the secret between us.”
“Remember that you promised to help me and you also said that you will stand by me. Note that our relationship can not only be built on money but it has got a lot to do with trust and love for people. How can we build this trust? Should we be binded by a contract bond which will be legally signed and sealed in the law court here in this country to avoid cheats from the both of us before we proceed? I need your opinion on this. And bear in mind that I can never do anything that will hurt your heart. It’s a promise. I assure you that this project is 100% risk free and legal, you will not have any problem in assisting me in this project as everything is legal and risk free.”
And here’s my response.
Thank you once again for your timely response. I feel they would be quicker if you wrote slightly shorter emails.
I notice that you did not answer my question from my last email. As I said, the biggest reason I have for continuing to do business with you is your religion. I have a personal rule about not doing business with anybody who does not fear the Lord. You did not answer my question about baptism. Does this mean you are in favour of baptising children?
I was writing this when you made your phone call. Please do not call me by phone in the future – I can not talk about this matter in front of my colleagues. We will have to conduct our communication by email or I will not be continuing our transaction.
I would like you to send me the details for the security company.
Thank you for your call. It is nice to know you are a real person – I have heard of people having money stolen in situations like this – so I believe it is important that we establish this trust.
I have another question for you to answer to help me trust you. Do you love Jesus?
My goal is to preach the gospel to this scammer. Lets see how far I get.
New friend
I have a new friend. His/her name is Michel(le). (S)he is from Cote d’ Ivoire. I’m helping him/her out with a little inheritance problem. Apparently his/her late father didn’t trust his countrymen.
Here are some of the details:
l am Michelle Robert, the only child of late Chief and Mrs Benjamin Robert, My father was a very wealthy cocoa merchant in Abidjan here, the economic capital of Ivory Coast, he was poisoned to death by his business associates on one of their business meeting. My mother died on the 20th January 1988 and my father took me so special because l am motherless.
Poor kid. Sounds so sad.
He also explained to me that it was because of this wealth that he was poisioned by his business associates , that l should seek for a GOD fearing foreign partner in a country of my choice where l will transfer this money and use it for proper investment purpose ,that I must finish my university education by the help of a business partner abroad,that he or she should help me obtain a resident permit in his or her country.
That was from the first email – signed off by Michelle. The second, after I indicated a willingness to continue discussions contained the following:
Hope you are fine today and your family , Happiness to hear that you will be willing to assist me retrieve this consignment deposited by my late father in the security company here in this country as you know I really appreciate the time you made out to reply to my mail to you. God in his infinite mercy will richly reward you for your concern and honesty towards me in this my difficult moment in life. God bless you abundantly.
This one was signed off by a “Michel” – and included a decidedly male photo.
I will question him/her about it in future emails. I had much more important questions to ask before pursuing any sort of business deal…
Here’s my response.
I am a very wealthy business man – and I didn’t get to that stage without being cautious about who I do business with. I’m very glad to say that you sound trustworthy – I too am a believer in God, and his mercy. Were we not on the same page theologically I would find it hard to continue in this matter.
Can you tell me – what are your thoughts on baptism?
I googled “Business Man” and used this picture – I hope the virtual me doesn’t mind.
Holy Consigliore?
There’s a story I’ve been following a bit – and thinking about writing about – about a family who didn’t want their son receiving medical treatment for cancer because it is “inconsistent” with their religious beliefs. I don’t know where the Bible talks about radiation therapy, or in fact not receiving any medical treatment. Jesus even said something about the sick needing doctors – not the healthy (to paraphrase without context)… But it’s ok, because they’ve relented. The boy gets treatment. Hooray. The really awesome thing though is the name of the family’s lawyer. Tom Hagen. The SMH reports…
“This family clearly loves and cares for Danny,” attorney Tom Hagen said. “The environment at the Hausers’ home is loving and caring. It is a healing place. Their main interest is in making sure Danny is OK.”
If my name was Tom Hagen I’d totally become a lawyer too. Though I’d specialise in entertainment law. And this would be my business card and I’d have these cushions on chairs in my waiting room. This would appear to be him – so if you want an awesomely named lawyer in the states – check him out. He works for these guys, who are currently virtually “under construction” and (according to Google he votes/donates Republican…)
YouTube Tuesday: Chk, Chk, Boom
There’s a slight language (and racism) warning to this video. Though I assume that unless you’ve been living under a rock you’ve already seen it.
Opinion on this whole situation – where a 19 year old gives a fake eyewitness account to a TV camera after a non-fatal shooting – is pretty split. I’m in the “I think this was a hilarious way to teach the media a lesson about verifying sources and not looking for a sensationalised quote at all costs” camp.
Seriously, reporting of this sort of shooting with “on the spot, live to air” broadcasts – or even rapid fire report filing – lends itself to this sort of treatment. And I hope she (Clare Werbeloff) rides this 15 minutes of fame as far as it takes her. The media deserve it – and the associated condemnation/celebration being carried out in print and over the airwaves just perpetuates the problem and justifies the behaviour.
Get soap in all the right places
It can be challenging to get Tetris pieces in the right place at the right time, just as it can be challenging to get soap into all the nooks and crannies… ok, that’s probably more talk about bathing than you can handled, particularly if you visualise things as you read… these Tetris soaps from Etsy might help.
3D pong
This is a beautifully rendered version of the classic computer game pong – well, actually, it’s a 3D rendering of a 2D rendering of a 3D game – that is to say it’s just Table Tennis – with a table designed to look like Pong. Confused? Well check it out – it’s from this guy…
How to evangelise
The Christian world’s preeminent blogger – Tim Challies – has a post featuring a great terrible guide to evangelism from the 50s. Here’s a clip – the post has heaps more…
A bunch of links – May 26, 2009
- Kiwis who took the money and ran located through Facebook update
- Why it’s hard not to stare at facial deformities
- All-in-One Wii, Xbox 360 and Ps3 Arcade Cabinet
- 10 Killer DIY Projects for Your Extra Day Off [Screenshot Tour]
- Get New YouTube Subscription Videos Via RSS
- What is quot;rationalquot; public discourse?
- Why Richard Dawkins’ beliefs blind him to evidence for God
- Terry Eagleton: Reason, Faith and Revolution
‘snot a good idea
Here’s a classy addition for your next birthday celebration – or in fact any candle lit dinner party. Noice. Some would say a bargain at $US3.99.
There’s also his Mustard companion…
CD Burners
When I was trawling through old posts to pick my favourites for that last post – I came across this site that I linked to a while back – it’s the “God Hates Fags” music blacklist. I can’t pick a favourite part of the text on the site to quote – so I’ll include it verbatim (that’s a little play on my title too).
One of the most dangerous ways Homosexuality invades family life is through popular music. Parents, please keep careful watch over your children’s listening habits. Especially in this age of Internet mp3 piracy.
There are multiple levels of Gay Music. Some bands are what we like to call Gateway Bands. They lure children in with Pop Grooves and Salacious Melodies leaving them wanting more. They’ll move on to more dangerous bands and the next thing you know you’ve got a homosexual for a child.
We’ve taken the time to highlight the bands that are particularly Gay. Please take the time and dissect your child’s CD / iTunes catalog. If you find 3 or more of these bands in their collection it is time to take action.
We Strongly recommend that you burn the CDs. Make sure your child is watching. Make sure they can feel the heat. It is crucial that the image remains emblazoned in their young minds. They need to know that if they continue to listen to these bands they may Burn eternally as well.
I’m thrilled to see the Jonas Brothers in the list – but there are many bands there that are in my CD collection or iTunes library. Definitely more than 3.
Actually, I’m pretty sure it’s a parody…
Some of my best work…
This blog has, in some shape or form, been around for a while. 3 and a half years in fact. And more than 1,400 posts. Which is much longer than most of my current readers would realise. I think. So it strikes me that you may have missed some of my sterling stainless steel early work. Which seems a shame.
So I’m going to start digging some out of the archives – or at least linking to them – just so they don’t go to waste.
The one where I solve the Croc V Shark debate by talking to an expert
The ones where try to get the Wiggles blacklisted and take on some Nigerian Scammers
The one with the awesome recipes from my share house days
The one were I get spammed by a bunch of students from Washington State University
The one where we play six degrees of Wikipedia
The one where I pick on a dangerous ninja
The one where I tell the Tractor Joke – and the one where somebody else improves it.
The one where I rant about emoticons.
The one where I took on a crazy Japanese tourist and turned it into a film noir novella.
The one where some people want to build a giant crucifix shaped conference centre.
The one about environmentally friendly dating services.
The one where Craig and I liveblog a Garage Sailing Adventure.
That’ll do. For now.
A bunch of links – May 25, 2009
- 40 Beautiful Examples of Minimalism in Web Design
- Multiplying fears: Islam and the demographic freedom of the church
- Multiplying fears: Islam and the demographic freedom of the church
- Anglican Churches in the Northern Region of Sydney
- today…
I guess the argument in the video that’s the topic of this post is that you should have three kids – one for Peter Costello, one for your baby bonus, and one for Jesus… but I haven’t watched the video yet. The post is interesting in its takedown of some obvious scaremongering.
To me, this pretty much sums up the problems with the Sydney Anglicans – so many churches in such a small geographical space. It’d be interesting to plot the number of evangelical churches around the rest of the country in comparison.