Christian Status Updates

WWJT: Can’t think of your own lame Christian status update, there’s a site for that

What would Jesus Tweet. It’s an important question for any would be Christian Confucius out there looking to use Facebook or Twitter as a platform for spiritual warfare.

Here’s a not very funny or self aware song that ponders a similar question… (via JesusNeedsNewPR)

It’s weird that when old people try to be hip and cool they use images of Dell desktop PCs from about 10 years ago in their hip, cutting edge, satire.

But that’s neither here nor there. This is a public service announcement for those out there who:

a) think posting one liners worthy of a church sign is of some benefit.
b) can’t come up with their own pithy one liners, you know, by reading the Bible.
c) want to use Facebook to annoy their friends, both Christian and non-Christian, rather than to bolster real relationships.

If you are that person, then rest easy. Here is a website that is a suppository of options, you can pull them out of your…

Here’s a sampling from today…

“____ The best way to start any day off right is to tell God how thankful you are.
____ P.U.S.H.> (P)ray (U)ntil (S)omething (H)appens
____ is strong because I know my weaknesses. I am wise because I know I’ve been foolish. I laugh because I’ve known sadness.
____ Don’t pass judgment on someone else’s life without looking at your own life first…
____ You know it’s grace when God gives you something you don’t deserve.”

By his stripes…

If you ever wanted a great piece of pictorial justification for not putting Christian status updates on Facebook – especially updates with jargon – then here you go.

On stupid guilt inducing status updates

Dear Christian Facebookers,

If you feel the need to inspire your Christian brothers and sisters to guilt please do so in a fitting and clever manner.

Do not post gut wrenching hallmark inspired guilt trips in your status and encourage other people to do the same.

If you post this:

“is a follower of Christ and proud to say it!! Let’s see how many people on FB aren’t afraid to show their love for God! Repost this as your status. Each time you see this on someone’s status, say a quick prayer for that person!! Lets get God back in this country like He should be!!! If you agree post this in your status update. Just copy and paste.”

I won’t unfriend you. But I will block your statuses from appearing in my news feed, and I will think a little less of you.

Even if it’s just because you used so many exclamation marks.

Mikey has good rules for Facebook Status Updates. Obey them.

UPDATE: There were several instances of this in my feed – this was not directed at anyone in particular – unless you were the culprit who instigated this practice to begin with…

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