don’t try this at home

Self fulfilling business strategy

I’ve often thought that the ideal business “strategy” (though highly illegal) would be buying the only panel beating workshop in a small town and paying a could of delinquents to go on a latenight rampage with baseball bats, or even getting somebody in the town’s transport department to keep issuing grannies their drivers license.

But I’ve got nothing on this Brazillian TV host, and former cop, whose crime show was lacking interesting murders. The solution is not to delve into the historical archives, or to cover the myriad kidnappings and violent crimes throughout South America… no. The answer is to start hiring hit men and then sending camera crews along to the scene.

He got caught because his crews kept arriving before the police. Brilliant idiot. He made the news in Australia because he just died in hospital while awaiting trial.

Cut price lasers will burn a hole in your pocket… and your leg

Not all technology belongs in the hands of consumers. And selling these to the general public for a relatively low price just sounds like a bad idea. But hey. Lasers. No, let me say that again right. LASERS. Lasers that burn stuff. Yeah. That’s right. And they’re shaped like lightsabers.

Standard warnings about not letting children near them obviously apply…

It’s called the “Spyder Pro Arctic Laser,” which even sounds like a weapon from a Bond movie.

Details, from the website:

The Artic emits a 445nm cool blue, ultra high power 1W beam which appears up to 4000% brighter than the Sonar’s 405nm violet beam. This direct blue laser diode is the result of the evolution of laser technology. Less than one year ago, this laser would have cost thousands of dollars to build. Don’t let the Arctic name fool you, this laser possesses the most burning capabilities of any portable laser in existence. That’s why it’s also the most dangerous laser ever created.

In recognizing and mastering the power of direct blue diodes, the Wicked Lasers’ Arctic shall become the standard by which all other blue lasers are judged.

Warning: Extremely dangerous is an understatement to the power of 1W of laser power. It will blind permanently and instantly and set fire quickly to skin and other body parts, use with extreme caution and only when using the included eye protection. Customers will be required to completely read and agree to our Class IV Laser Hazard Acknowledgment Form.

A project for the weekend

If you’re not doing anything this weekend you could try to make this rubber band machine gun. Or this machine rubber band gun… either way it’ll be great fun going back to work with this on Monday…

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