Tag Archives: how to worship

How to write a bad worship song

You may have already seen this – but I thought it relevant as we’re currently discussing why you shouldn’t listen to rock’n’roll. If you want to provide something more wholesome you should follow this advice – how to write an awful worship song

One of my favourites:

Be Vague About Your Theology

Make sure to avoid any theology at all costs. Don’t talk about atonement, wrath, or any other biblical concepts. You want your song to be all about feeling. Don’t let the mind get in the way. Repeat after me: “Worship is a warm feeling, sort of like heartburn, only better.”

How to fit in at a pentecostal church

Everyone knows, that apart from my wife, all the really good looking Christian girls go to pentecostal churches.

If you’re a young man hoping to lure a princess away from the Pentecostal Castle to a more moderately expressive church then you need to know how to fit in on your covert visits.

This video will help…

Via David Ould.