Video kills the local preacher
Well, not literally. But the second post in the debate on video preaching over at toph-online has just been reposted after a hiatus (first post). I wrote a long comment on this post. I was a little bit angry – but it’s a helpful discussion.
Here’s the final summary of my thoughts on the matter on that post. Which you should read – along with the previous posts, and the comments. I think.
“Video preaching driven by the preacher is inherently arrogant, and video preaching driven by adherents is inherently idolatrous.”
As you can see, I’m not a fan. But there’s a lot of interesting points made on both sides of the debate.
The Beginners Guide to Taking Over the World – Historical figures
Some historical figures worth noting
Julius Caesar
Possibly the most successful ruler never to have been immortalised by a major Hollywood blockbuster, Julius Caesar, the man whose surname became synonymous for king, began the ascent of the Roman empire, ending a period of civil war and beginning a process of expansion that would last for centuries.
Genghis Kahn
The East’s answer to Julius Caesar, part of a long dynasty of Kahn rulers. Lead the Mongols on a path of terror and conquest that even Hitler would have been proud of.
Alexander the Great
Took the Greek civilisation to its highest point, famous for his nice curly hair and military prowess.
Attila the Hun
Lead one of the most successful attacks on the Roman Empire, eventually made peace with them and died of a nose hemorrhage (what kind of warrior dies of a nose hemorrhage, seriously, what a soft way to go, imagine him in a post-life meeting with the other famous military leaders, comparing notes over deaths, no poisonous asp, no sword thrust from behind, a nose hemorrhage, how very lame). Attila, or Hunny to his friends – he didn’t have many friends, is also famous for eating a couple of his sons. True story, if you don’t want a family dynasty that may be an option to consider.
Napoleon
The last great leader of the French, some say Napoleon is one of the greatest military minds ever to have lived. I differ, if he was a great military mind he would have chosen a different nation to lead. I mean he wasn’t even born French, he was born Italian, Italians make much better cannon fodder… I mean soldiers. Armies of Frenchmen are only ever going to fail in the long term. Napoleon’s eventual exile to Elba was inevitable the French were always going to fail. Rumour has it that while in transit to Elba he offered up possibly the world’s coolest palindrome “Able was I ere I saw Elba” he’s worth noting just for that.
Josef Stalin
Showed that it was still in vogue for dictators to have cities named after them. Also helped transform Russia from international also-rans into international heavyweights. He was instrumental in creating the Soviet Union, which became one of the big powers of the twentieth century.
Adolf Hitler
Proved that it was possible to be taken seriously even with a stupid moustache. It helped that he had a large and powerful army behind him. Also showed that the fashions of evil tyrants become unpopular very quickly after their failure – you don’t see many “square button” moustaches around these days do you.
George W. Bush
Proved that being an international powerbroker did not, as previously believed, require any intelligence or leadership ability. It does help to have a powerful father and a paranoid populace to work with. But these are obstacles that can be overcome with enough hard work and a little luck. Also demonstrated that preemptive defense is the best form of attack.
Froth and bubbles
Stephen Morrison is the current World Barista Champion. So his opinions are worth considering when it comes to coffee. Here’s what he has to say about how to craft a nice cappuccino:
“I hate froth. That horrible aerated hallmark of badly textured, often burnt milk. The word foam evokes much nicer sensory memories. For me, in the context of milk, foam means OK, froth means nasty.”
And here’s why you should keep your coffee machine nice and clean (and well serviced)… especially if you run a cafe, and the World Barista Champion drops by, and then writes something about the experience on his blog:
“Oddly the temperature was OK, but I think they may have just added some cold milk at the end. The taste itself was just rank. I really really don’t like dirty machines, especially that dirty machine taste. Well this cappuccino just tasted like licking a dirty portafilter basket with a hint of chocolate (from the actual chocolate – not a nuance of the coffee) and a little bit of flat un-sweet froth. Bitter, ashy and wrong.”
X-rayted blanket
If anatomically correct cakes aren’t your thing perhaps you’d prefer this wonderful quilt cover. It’s particularly useful if you’re studying medicine or some other silliness. Horizontal thinking was all the rage back when I was at uni – and this would make it semi legitimate.
Funniest home videos
I spent last Saturday morning going through some old family home videos ahead of dad’s 50th birthday (on April 12). I have to edit them down into a nice little family video production. Dad has set the video production bar pretty high – as you’ll see on his design4church blog. Here’s the MPC promo video for this year’s “Rechurch” theme…
Oh the shame. My parents recorded some very cruel things that will no doubt come back to haunt my two sisters who have not yet celebrated 21st birthdays. Tomorrow I will resume this task.
I wonder if there are ethical problems with posting videos of your younger siblings doing embarrassing things on YouTube without their consent and many years after the fact?
Would it balance it out if I posted skeletons from my own closet? Like the matinée performance of my starring role in our fifth grade (at school not a comment on quality) musical performance of Oliver.
On a thing and a prayer
A few weeks back I made the suggestion that I was looking for something meaty to post about. But it had to be something that wouldn’t in any way disqualify me from future Presbyterian ministry. Simone suggested I write about prayer in church. I’m sure this was mostly prompted by a comment I made on her blog about a frustration I have about the “quality control” some churches employ when it comes to prayer time.
So here goes.
I think prayer is important in church. That’s obvious. I am in no way diminishing the fact that talking to our heavenly father is an integral part of church life – and must be part of the church service.
Public prayer is an interesting creature. Done well it can be encouraging and uplifting. Done very well it can spur people on to Godly thinking and concern for others – not to mention that faithful prayer is important to the spiritual life of a church community.
Done badly prayer can appear to be nothing more than a press release about the upcoming activities of a church. “We pray for the upcoming dinner socials, we pray for the car wash, etc…”. When prayer points are pulled straight out of the church notices they’re neither informative or insightful – it’s fair enough to pray for the fruit of an evangelistic event, or for an important training event, or in fact to pray for any ministry or event being run by the church in question. But to do it from the notice sheet verbatim is an easy trap for the nervous prayer – and serves nobody.
The other trap I think churches can fall into is forcing (or teaching or instructing) prayers to write down their prayers. Unless you’re a trained reader reading will always sound like reading not like natural speech. It’s unavoidable. Inevitable even. If you’ve got someone reading their prayer it doesn’t matter how well prepared they are – it will sound read. And things that sound read don’t sound like they’re from the heart – and prayer should be (and public prayer should sound) from the heart, not from a script. Especially not from a script that sounds overly honed for the benefit of keeping tight and presentable.
But… I hear you say. “But if people don’t write their prayers down they ramble and umm and ahh and that sounds so ungainly”… well I say “so what”. And if that’s really a problem train people in public speaking rather than get them to write down their prayers. Nobody wants to hear ramble – so train people to pray from points.
When Jesus was teaching his disciples how to pray (ie when he taught them the Lord’s Prayer), and later when he was in the Garden of Gethsemane prior to the crucifixion, there was no mention of putting your thoughts to paper first. He prayed from the heart and with purpose, and subject to God’s will. Those should be the criteria by which we judge church prayers.
I struggle to come to terms with the idea that prayer is like music – and that those serving the body of Christ through prayer should be as prepared as the musician or the preacher. I know where the intention comes from. I too am a pragmatist. But I don’t think there’s anything worse for outsiders than praying to our living God in a stilted, unfeeling manner – a manner I think is encouraged by insisting on scripted prayer.
That is all. Next time I feel the need to write something that will make people angry I’m going to pick on church music. Sacred cows are fun topics.
Finally
My iPhone has arrived.
Thanks to the power of persuasion and a sympathetic employer.
Make your next barbie a swordid affair
What could be more fun than stabbing your sausages with a makeshift sword?
Stabbing your sausages with a makeshift sword while wearing a free mask… that’s what. And now, make that dream come true, this product doubles as a great prop for the next time you want to reenact Zorro in your backyard.
If you need some more help or guidance with your backyard culinary exploits or you’re more of a “cook by numbers” type – then take your barbecuing to the next point in the grid with this spreadsheet grill.
Shirts of the Day: League of cliched comic characters
Two shirts today folks. Variations on a theme if you will. A comic book theme. Featuring every single type of comic book character known to man. An encyclopedia of comic book media…
The good guys…
and the bad guys…
Both from Threadless.
This runner up (also from Threadless) features famous authors. 20 of them. Can you name any?
Kick out the jam
I’ve mentioned GraphJam before. It’s a fun site. It has funny graphs. Now it has a graph that I made. I’m unsure whether I think it’s funny or not. Making graphs for GraphJam proved to be particularly easy. You can do it here. If you do, and send me a copy, I’ll post it under mine. We’ll have a GraphJam jam. If you made a graph about jam we could have a jam GraphJam jam.
Bridge over troubled water
Ok, ok, so I might be going overboard with my enthusiasm on the Simon and Garfunkel reunion – but humour me. A toll road is not a bridge. But it’s close.
Have you heard the story about Nick Bolton. He’s the shareholder threatening progress on Australia’s biggest infrastructure project.
Nicholas Bolton - From the SMH
His story is a lesson in always reading the fine print when snapping up a bargain. He thought he’d found one when he bought 47 million shares in the company building the Brisbane Airport Toll Road – BrisConnections. They cost him $47,000. The small print pointed to two future payments of $1 per share. But he missed that bit. Ouch.
Not to be deterred – or overly concerned about the looming $94 million payment he’ll have to make – Nick is trying to close down the company. He’s almost a majority shareholder – and there are others who are in the same boat.
He’s currently in court. It’s a funny story. Shame he doesn’t listen to Muse. Their lyrics may prove prophetic in his case. Ahh Muse. They’ve got a song for all seasons…
“take, take all you need
and i’ll compensate your greed
with broken hearts…”“Say, it’ll make you insane
and it’s bending the truth
you’re to blame
for all the life that you’ll lose and
you watch this space
but i’m going all the way
and be your slave to the grave”
– Lyrics from The Small Print, by Muse
Bombs Away
Bombs can be beautiful. They’re design is often streamlined for aerodynamic purposes which creates a certain aesthetic value. They often feature nice curves, and the symmetrical wings on their tails are a designer’s dream. Perhaps. Isn’t it a shame they’re used for such destructive purposes. Those peaceniks reading this should buy one of these vases to really make a statement.
The armamentophiles (my new term for people who like armaments) out there should buy them to complete the World War II chic decorating theme they’re going for in the bathroom with these – and these beautiful stickers. Bombs away.
That 70s Show
It’s 70’s reunion week this week. Apparently. Two of the best duos to come out of the 60s and 70’s (who also both split somewhat acrimoniously) have reformed recently and both have just announced tours of Australia.
Both these duos have been seminal influences on my taste in comedy and music, and musical comedy.
Cheech and Chong – everybody’s favourite stoners – are coming out of semi-retirement for a series of stand up dates around Australia.
And perhaps more importantly – and much more excitingly – Simon and Garfunkel will be touring Australia later this year. They’re playing a show in Brisbane (and a few others around the country) that will no doubt sell out instantly and be exorbitantly priced…
