Category: Scambaiting

Meet Bruce

This is Bruce. He is my new scambaiting alterego. I have decided that rather than boring all those not interested in my scambaiting exploits I will set up a category that is excluded from the main page and the RSS feed – but available from a nice, easy to find, link. Which I will add when I’ve set it up. For now, this is Bruce. He’s pleased to meet you. And to help you with any foreign banking dramas you might have…

The Doctor

I must find out what sort of doctor Dr Paul is. Especially since now I’M GOING TO VISIT HIM IN GHANA. Yes. That’s right people. That’s worthy of a "shout" I think…

Actually, I should spell out – I am not stupid. There is no way known to man that I will be visiting Ghana any time soon. Dr Paul thinks differently. Because I made him… Evidently the wild goose chase I’m sending him on – back and forth to the Western Union office – is taking its toll.

Thank you very much for your mail. my friend am go to western union now if i came back i will get back to you. my friend if i have any problem i will let you no because since last night am so worry about this problem. my friend i want to go now and meet the man in western union if i come back i will let you no. Am looking forward to hear from you soon.
Yours Friend
Dr Paul

Western Union didn’t come through with the goods – so he called me again – and then sent me this email…


Thank you very much for your mail . my friend am not happy for all this that going on now. my friend since that time i call you on phone i want to western union to meet the man after the check again the told me that the money is not there.

please my friend this type i never see it before that some one  send me money i did not see. my friend am please you in the name of God come back to that  western union you send this money collect this money back and send it to any order western union again and send me the information please because this one you send i have try all i can do to see that i pick this money but no way please.

my friend this can of ward i never see it before since i have being in this office. my friend please try do very thing today so by tomorrow diplomat can come and deliver this fund to you.  my friend as am sending this mail to you am so worry about this problem that come out now. since morning here the custom there calling me to burn the money i told them will have big now by collect the money.

once again my friend because of the way i love you makes me being run round since last night for you to collect you fund. my friend as i told you try do it this way it help you and me so all this problem will do fast. i want very thing been round up this week so you can feel happy. Am loking forward to hear from you today.

Yours Friend

Dr paul

Something is wrong. All the details I sent him were correct…It’s time for me to sort this out, in person.

Dr Paul,
I have been to see Western Union – they say the money has definitely been sent. And their records show it has been collected in Ghana.
Now you are claiming that you did not receive the money and asking me to send it again. I am concerned. The lady at Western Union said I should be careful because she has seen people tricked out of money by people from Ghana before.
I told her that you are my good friend. And that I trust you to be truthful to me because you are a Christian brother.
Dr Paul, I hope this is true. I will not be sending money again by Western Union. If you have not received the money that I have sent then I think I must arrange a trip to Ghana to sort this out.
I will book flights in the next few days. Will you be able to meet me at the airport and arrange accommodation for me – I must stay in a hotel with at least a 4 star rating and a reliable internet connection.
Please can you book this for me. I will send you through my flight details shortly. I will come to your country for 5 days. That should be enough to sort out this matter. I will also bring a significant sum of money to ensure any problems with this situation can be ironed out.
Please let me know as soon as possible if the money has turned up – if I don’t hear from you in the next 12 hours I will book these flights.

Apparently it’s all Western Union’s fault and I should now use MoneyGram instead. Dr Paul is calling me every 20 minutes today – and I’ve ignored most of his calls.


Thank you very much for our phone discuss. my friend am not happy for all this problem but my God grace all this problem will done very well my friend. about to come to Ghana am not advice you for that because it will collect you much money so what you will now go to money gram and send it money please. my friend try to do it now please. my friend what makes me  i told you not to  come ghana i done want you to have problem i will use my hand here do very thing for you . This is the information you will use to send it on money gram now onbelow



Am looking forward to hear from you today.

Yours Friend

Dr paul

What? He doesn’t want me to come… I thought kidnapping and extortion would be more lucrative… I best give him a carrot…

My dear Dr Paul,
I am a wealthy man. Paying to visit your part of the world, my friend, would not concern me. I have not been there. Perhaps there are business opportunities I can explore.
I am concerned. I am wealthy because I do not take being ripped off kindly. I will no doubt be able to sue Western Union for lots of money – including my travel costs – if I get to Ghana and find they have stolen my money.
My friend, I think that I will come to Ghana rather than pay more money to Money Gram. I will book my flights and let you know the details.
The only thing that will stop my arrival is if you receive the Western Union money in the next few hours. Perhaps there has been some delay in the transfer clearing from Australia.
Please let me know if my travel is unnecessary for this reason. I will not invest a second sum of money until I know what has happened to the first.
Kind regards brother,

Now I need to give him $500 to smooth the way for my trip…


Thank you very much for your mail once again. my friend as you told me that you will come to ghana no problem is good. As i told you on phone about this $500 please go now and send it so my morning time here i will go and collect the money and get this document for you. This is the information you will use it to send it through western union money transfer onbelow;



Am looking forward to hear from you today.

Yours Friend
Dr paul

That sounds odd. What is this $500 for?

Dr Paul,
What exactly is this money for?
I will not trust Western Union with my money again until I have been to Ghana to sort out this problem.
In fact, I don’t feel comfortable wiring money via any service until I get to the bottom of things.
I will bring the $500 with me, and further funds to cover emergencies.

He replied…


Thank you very once again. my friend i no you are not happy what western union do before. but i want to assure you that you will not going to have any problem again. please try send this money so i will go and burn this document and send to you before you come to ghana.

my friend this documnet i want to use this money it is very important . so my friend if you can not send it to western union please go to money gram and send this money fast because this $500 is very important so i will get this document and send to you because this document you will show them in airport because you come in. Am loking forward to hear from you today

Yours Friend

Dr paul

He needs to burn some documents? How droll. Now, I want my photo. The promise of significant funds might be enough…

Dr Paul,
I can not answer more phone calls today. My colleagues are already suspicious. My friend, I do not want people to know about this deal they will want money from me.
Dr Paul – it worries me that this money has disappeared – perhaps you should try Western Union again just in case – I have spoken again to the local lady, I don’t think she has any idea what she is doing.
My Friend, please, can you go to Western Union and explain the situation and ask what could possibly have happened to my money.
I will not send more to your country without delivering it in person. The lady at Western Union, she said that it’s probably a scam. That you have taken my money and want me to send it again so that you can take more.
I don’t believe her – but you remember we had some problems earlier where I believed you to be a criminal. Dr Paul, I think, before I invest more money in a trip overseas, or send you more money by wire, I think you need to at last, take a step to demonstrate good faith.
I need you to send me a photo to reassure me that you are who you say you are. I need this Dr Paul, or the deal is off. I have already spent $850 for nothing. When you are as rich as me that is not a lot of money in the big picture, but you don’t get rich like me without being careful with your money. And I am a prudent and careful man.
You must do this. Send me a photo holding a sign like I asked to begin with, or the deal is off. As a Christian brother I ask that you hold a sign with your favourite verse from the Bible.
Please Dr Paul. I can not tell you how important this photo is to securing this deal and my travel to Ghana.

Dr Paul – Resurrected

Yesterday’s Dr Paul post got me feeling a little bit nostalgic. I miss our late night phone calls. I decided to see if I could redeem our relationship – and pursue the conclusion of our transaction. I ate humble pie. I apologised.

Dr Paul,
I wonder if you have had a chance to reconsider this arrangement.
I would like you to consider continuing with this transaction under the terms dictated previously.
As a sign of good faith I will be transferring a portion of the payment to Emmanuel via Western Union when I receive your reply.

And he took the bait.


Thank you very much for your mail. how are you today my friend. my friend before you make my main to feel bad but now i no that you main have come down. so my friend since that time you fund is in airport waiting for you but because of the way you make my main fee bad make me that i did not contact you again. my friend that last time i try all i can do to see that i help you but you do want to understand me. but if you have come down just go and send it money today and get back to me fast so diplomat will live first tomorrow morning.

My friend as am sending you this mail all arrangement have make to deliver this fund to you this very week.  but friend just belive me that i will help you got you fund this week if you follow my word, but am happy now you main have come down because i did not like if am telling somebody truth it will hear me. so my friend please as you getting this mail now go and send this money fast. Am looking forward to hear a good new from you today.

Yours Friend

Dr Paul

Now, I’ve been doing a little bit of reading up on the whole scambaiting thing – Gilbert from – is the master. He has devised a number of ways to pay the scammers, without forking out any actual money. I decided to take this game to a new level… enter, the Western Union receipt.

Dear Dr Paul.
I went to the local Western Union agent to do the transfer – attached is a poorly scanned copy of the receipt. The post office I visited to conduct this transfer had very old equipment.
I will send you a better quality version when I can.
Good day sir.

Right. That’s official looking. I’ve paid my dues. It’s time for Dr Paul to come through with the goods.

Sadly, Western Union have an online facility for verifying the details of these things…


My friend i have big problem now in western union the paper you send to me for the payment ,the MTCN number is not ok. my friend please go back to western union now fast and go am collect the information again because this one you send to me the MTCN number have mistake.

my friend please try do it fast now am in western union waiting for you. so by tomorrow diplomat will start coming to deliver you fund to you. my friend as i want to western to pick up this money the western union the find this mistake. please as i told you go now and collect the correct information please. my friend please try do very thing fast now so i will run down to airport and give them this money.Am looking forward to hear from you now.

Yours Friend

Dr paul

His request came outside of office hours – how could I possibly acquiesce – besides, the details are right. I’m sure of it…

Dr Paul, 

I am sure the details are correct – I also had to give the clerk a security question – they said these are mandatory for transactions to your country.

The question – was "what’s your favourite bible verse" – the answer is Exodus 20:15.

I got into Western Union’s local agency prior to their closing for the day – that receipt is exactly what they provided me.

You may need to work this out with the clerk on your side.

This is when the phone calls started. I’m not ready to talk to him again just yet. I suspect he stole my money.


Thank you very much for your mail once again my good friend. my friend am not lair to you am telling you the truth please. my good friend i can collect this money and told you that i did not collect. my friend the code i try it by my hand in western union web site the code is not OK. my friend am please you to go back to that western union you send this money and please them to check it for you again so the will give you correct code please.

my friend since that time am standing in western union in fact not happy will them the time the check it and tell me the code is not correct. my friend let you main come down, try go now to western union send this and tell them to give you the correct code please. my friend since morning here am run round in airport to see that diplomat will move today. my friend i can lair to you am child of God. please take it easy very thing will being ok.

my friend please take my word i will not lair to you because i take you as my good friend. my friend how can i lair to my good friend i want to help.  my friend do it fast so i will take the payment to airport now.Am looking forward today

Yours Friend

Dr Paul

Indeed. Computers. Who can trust them. The Western Union system must be down… I have a few ideas of what might be causing the hold up (other than that I didn’t actually send any money of course…).

Perhaps the payment won’t clear for a day or two – I did pay by cheque. You might need to try again tomorrow or the next day. I will confirm that the details are correct – what number did you try?

They also said you’d have to go in person – not on the website – because you are in Ghana. There are special rules dictating transfers from Australia to some African nations.

That must surely be it…


Thank you once again my friend. my good friend since am in this office i never see this before.  my friend please have you contact  the western union where you send this money since this problem come out?

please my friend if you did not contact them please try contact them so very thing will be clear fast. my friend by now diplomat have to live Ghana today but because of this problem is in airport waiting for me to come back and do the payment before he live Ghana will this fund. my friend this is transfer control number:8561629001  i see in that paper you send to me. my friend i will never lair to you in my life.

my friend am Man of 56year , i have three sons so  for me to lair to you can not help me. so my friend take my word very thing will be nice. my friend since today am never have Rest because of you try help me as am helping you here. Am looking forward to hear from you today.

Yours Friend

Dr Paul

Hmm. He’s never seen this before. Well, it must be a Western Union problem. The scent of payment got him pretty excited. I missed 6 calls from him last night. So this morning I sent him these two emails.

Dr Paul, 

Has the money arrived? I trust that this has all been sorted overnight and we can now proceed with the transaction.

Let me know what must be done in order for the diplomat’s trip to be a success.

Dr Paul,

That number is definitely correct. I have spoken to the lady at Western Union here – she said there are some computer issues that have prevented the transaction being registered with the Internet service – and said you need to go into the Western Union branch nearest to you to claim the funds.
The funds have definitely been transferred and cleared.

Gripping conclusion: Dr Paul and Miss Anna Mensah

Short of things to write about (well other than the queue of things that will fill the RSS feed and Curiosities column in coming days) – I thought I’d give you the conclusion of the Dr Paul saga – from the email point of view – you’ve heard the final phone call already…

After that phone call he sent me one last email, or so he thought…


Thank you very much for our phone discuss today. my friend am try to let you no my explantion but you are go head talking too much.. but my friend all this you are doing will not help you our. my friend just do what i told you very thing will being ok. but if you done want to do that will can stop this deliver.


Dr Paul”

He’s still so polite, and after I’d been so rude. But I could tell he wasn’t going to send me a photo – so it was time to play hardball… This response is perhaps “truth with love” – tough love…

It’s too late Dr Paul. You are a criminal. You are trying to catch me in a Western Union Advance Fee Fraud. I am not stupid. Your unwillingness to provide a simple request proves that you are not to be trusted. 

I have told you the conditions under which I will continue the transaction. The ball is in your court.

If you’re not willing to do this then you are a scammer. A criminal. A thief.

You know what my favourite bible verse really is. Exodus 20:15. Though shall not steal.

You are not a very good scammer. Is this your first time? Has anybody ever given you money before? You are low. You are lower than a snake. I can’t believe anyone would be convinced by you – you can’t even get your name straight.

I will be putting your name all over the internet and approaching Yahoo to close your account – I hope I have wasted much of your time and prevent you stealing money from other victims.

A good scammer would have provided the small piece of evidence requested by their target.

You know what you really need. Jesus. Read the Bible. Leave your life of stealing money from innocent people and get a real job. Stop your deceit. Stop your stealing. Repent. You know what waits for unrepentant sinners – the eternal fires of hell.

Jesus loves you – he died for you. Even though you’re a thief and a liar who has no doubt stolen money from many innocent people with your little act.

Probably not the best piece of relational evangelism ever – and that’s when he rang me to call me stupid (the final phone call)…

Perhaps strangest of all was some sort of tag team strategy that Dr Paul began at that time. The “incompetent boss strategy”…

Welcome Ms Anna Mensah, Dr Paul’s much maligned secretary:

“Dear.Mr.Nathan Campbell

It is my pressure to contact you base on the information I got on your fund in Bank Of Ghana. I am Ms. Anna Mensah a personal secretary to Dr. PAUL ACQUAH Governor of the Bank of Ghana. I saw your file on my boss desk, is among three beneficiaries their fund have been

approved as part payment of US$15.7 million in this second quarter of this fiscal year 2009.

However, in your file you have 1% of the total amount of your money, a bill of KNOW YOUR CUSTOMER (KYC) to pay before your fund will be credited into your nominated account. I know too well that for the sake of what you have passed through in the hands of impostors and some corrupt bank officials in the course of getting your long overdue payment, you will not

like to pay any other money upfront.

To this effect Sir, I will like to introduce to you a financier who is very close to Bank of Ghana that will see the release of your fund and pay all the outstanding bill that have been with-holding the release of your fund and he will take 20% of the total money.

Sir, this information is between you and I, if you accept this offer your long overdue fund will hit your nominated account in less than a week pending on how fast you and financier are working out things. I will be waiting to hear your urgent response.

Yours sincerely
Ms. Anna Mensa”

Well, at this stage Nathaniel McIntosh Campbell was on his Christian high horse, and had had enough of this Dr Paul character who wouldn’t provide the photo he was asked for…

“Hi Miss Anna Mensah, 

You need to go back to secretarial school – you can’t even spell your own name.

Unfortunately your boss is a liar and a criminal. I hope he pays you – he won’t pay me, and he certainly won’t provide me with the proof that I have asked for the legitimacy of this deal.

I have no reason to believe that this is not a bunch of lies that you two are spinning in order to steal my 1% payment of the money I won’t ever receive. You ask me to trust you with a payment but you won’t trust me with a photo.

Unrepentant liars go to hell Ms Mensa(h). Remember that. I hope you don’t often steal money from innocent people. “

Yeah. Cop that. After the final phone call I wrote to Anna again, with a bit more carrot, and a bit less stick…

Dear Ms Anna,
I would like to make a formal complaint about the conduct of your superior – Dr Paul Acquah – he has been quite rude to me, he has hurt my feelings, and his customer service was extremely poor. Could you direct me to another employee who can take on my case and pass my feedback on to his boss?
I really think international clients should be treated with more respect. He was abrasive, he did not listen to me and he refused to comply with my requests.
I trust you will act discretely on this matter.
Nathaniel McIntosh Campbell

Perhaps Ms Anna will be the one to come through for me…

I acknowledge the receipt of your mail. I have noted your words and believe that you will stand on it. how are you my good friend. my friend all you have to do now that you have send me all this infromation so will can start this transfer. my friend i done like the way you talk to me on frist email you sent to me before, but because of love i have on you i will help you.This is the information onbelow you have to send it down fast.
I am waiting for your responde.
Yours Sincerely
Ms Anna Mensah

Now, I’m not stupid. Some people are worried that these guys are dangerous – and with good reason. I’m unlikely to give them my address or any copies of my ID unless I can be certain that they’re legit. Like the guy in Flight of the Conchords… Sadly, Miss Anna’s love is unrequited.

Dear Miss Mensah, 

I will not be providing any of these details until I am sure you are not criminals. You must do several things for me before I provide those details:

1. Advise what action will be taken against Dr Paul.

2. Provide me a piece of identification – and a separate photograph to collaborate your identity – this photo must be produced to prove to me that you are not either Dr Paul in disguise or a criminal scammer. I would like you to send me a photo of you holding a sign that says "Exodus 20:15".

3. Provide me a written apology from Dr Paul for delaying this transaction through incompetence and being unwilling to meet the set parameters.

Once you have done these things I will send you my address.

Dr Paul has my mobile number – as you have my file on my desk this shouldn’t be a problem.

I live in Cairns, Queensland, Australia.

I will not send you my identification until I can be sure you are who you say you are. You are requesting me to send you money – the onus is on you to prove your identity not on me to prove mine.

Once you have established that trust we can do business.

I told them I’m in Cairns. They need the boost in international tourism that will come from a squad of angry African scammers…

I haven’t heard back from either of them since.

I do have a couple of other scammers on the go – I’ve had to start up a second email account though just to be on the safe side.

They call him Dr Paul

It’s pretty lame when you have to reference a They Might Be Giants song to come up with a title… but what can you do. Two last phone calls from Dr Paul – more emails will be posted tomorrow.

Phone phonies

Hopefully there’ll be an MP3 player there I had to embed this as a YouTube video – if there’s not, here’s a link to download the phone call that ended my relationship with Dr Paul.

He called me twice more last night, the calls were equally funny and will be posted here soon.

Photographic memories

It doesn’t look like Dr Paul will be coming through with a photo for me. Well, not the photo I want. He did send me this:

You’ll not that that’s not what I asked for. Sadly, he was pretty insistent that it’d be all I get.

Dr Paul,
It’s great I’ve got your passport picture – I really do need that second photo before I send you your money.
I have a question regarding the final transfer – what currency do you need the money in? You haven’t specified this – I assume Ghana’s currency – the Cedi – is what you’re after?
Please let me know when you provide the photo as requested.

He was less than forthcoming.


Thank you for your mail, and sorry for my late response, my friend because of big work i have in office makes me not to contact you since some days now, please am very sorry.

You can find the attache  copy of my office id card, so my friend try you best to see that  you sent the money down by next week diplomat will come over and deliver this fund to you.Am looking forward to hearing form you today.

Yours Freind


This was not acceptable to me. No sirree.

Dear Dr Paul.

Your ID card is not what I requested.

I requested a photo that could not be faked. Your unwillingness to provide what I have asked concerns me.

I also asked what sort of currency you want the transfer conducted in – and you didn’t answer that either.

I look forward to receiving your photo. As requested. With you holding a card with the words I have requested – either “John 3:16” or “Robot in disguise”. If you would prefer to come up with your own suggestion please let me know.

I must insist on a photo that could not be doctored or faked. Please supply this to me as quickly as possible. My patience is wearing thin.

He did not like this. Clearly I’m not following the script – he rang me to tell me that nobody else requires this sort of “proof”. I’m not normal. And he wrote to me to say the same thing.


Thank you for your mail and explanations so far. my dear am not happy for you because i live very thing am doing in my office to see that you get this fund this very week but you are making very thing to go back. my dear the photo you are telling me i can not do that because since many people like you have being get the fund nobody of them told me this can of thing ,so my friend if you really want this fund the want to deliver to you please tell me but if you want it tell me because the way you are talk to me i did not like it.

once again my friend i done no how i want to help you but you done want to understand friend if you are not interest tell me in time now so i will not being westing my time. my friend i give you my internation passport you did not understand me, i give you my id you too but you done want to understand so i will not die my self to you. Am looking forward to hear from you soonest .
Yours Friend
Dr Paul

Something needed to change in order for me to secure my photo. I had to give him an incentive.

Dr Paul.

I am sorry I did not answer your calls last night. I was very tired and couldn’t quite wake myself from my sleep.

I am starting to doubt you. I would say I am at best 30% confident in you. You have promised me an improbable amount of money. You have failed to provide the evidence that I have requested. You have sent me incorrect identification. You have ignored specific and reasonable questions over and over again.

$850 is a lot of money to throw away to a person in a country famous for corruption without doing proper due process and getting the evidence required.

Dr Paul – as the head of an international bank I would not think accessing a camera is beyond your means. I can’t understand why this task seems beyond you. Perhaps you’re busy seeing Barack Obama. I heard he was in your country calling for reform of your banking institutes. I hope this goes well for you.

I really must insist that you provide this photo that I have asked for before we go any further. Your passport and ID card mean nothing without this.

It is you that does not understand – provide the photo I have requested and we will conclude this transaction.

He responded with a phone call – so I wrote to him again…

Dr Paul,

I was glad to hear from you today.

I can’t understand why the fact that you’ve never done something before means that you can’t do it now. Has anybody asked you to do this before?

I don’t think you’re being reasonable. I have made a simple request and you have refused to comply. I thought we were friends. Give me one good reason why you should not provide the photo?

I can’t think of a reason for you to refuse, unless you are trying to defraud me.

I thought you wanted me to receive my money…

You are not being helpful.

Say hello to president Obama for me.

He responded to that one…


Thank you very much for your mail and all the infromation you have being sending to me. my friend i do like the way you have being talking to friend since in my life i have being send many people the fund i never see any body that told me to do this you told me to do. please my friend if you did want  diplomat to come and deliver this fund to you just tell me now so i will not being westing my time.

once again one thing am advice you that i will never do this can thing because you are giving me too much  disgrace. i give you my internationpassport and my id but you do want it, so i will never do any thing again. i live very thing am doing in my office want to help but you done want you help you self. so my friend all i want to told you now that if you done want to take my word or follow my word please stop contacting me. Am looking forward hear from you soon.

Yours Friend
Dr paul

Well, I am treading on thin ice. But I want my money. Well actually, I’d settle for my photo.

Dr Paul,

If this money is legally mine how can you possibly refuse to conduct business with me? I will report you to your superiors at the bank.

You have two choices – do what I say and provide the photograph or don’t do what I say and I will report you.

Once you do what I ask of you my friend I will transfer the money – and a generous fee for your time – to the contact you requested. I believe you should be unofficially recompensed for your hard work. I know you are just doing your job. I’m sorry that you find my caution insulting. I wish you would see it for what it is – an opportunity to build the trust and fidelity that exists between us.

I feel I have possibly not explained myself clearly enough. I once was presented with a similar offer from the Cote D I’vor – where I sent an advance fee in order to secure monies owing to me – it’s hard to know what money is out there owing to my family on account of our large property holdings throughout the world. The Cote D’Ivor deal turned out to be a fraud and I lost a significant sum of money. I am careful not to be caught up in that situation again – and so I ask you to do this one small thing for me.

Please Dr Paul –  do not be upset or insulted. We are friends are we not? I would simply like to have that friendship confirmed with this act of loyalty and good faith. It worries me that you are not willing to act in such a way.

He was upset and insulted.


Thank you very much for your mail and explanations so far. my friend you are doing this like me and you was i having problem. my friend all i want to advice you that if you are willing to sent the money so you fund will deliver to you do it but if you go head and talking too much word it will not help you. my friend just do what i told yiou to do very thing will been ok. Am looking forward to hear from you soon.

Yours Friend

Dr paul

Poor Dr Paul. He needs some real “hard evidence” of my fidelity. And I need my photo…

Dear Dr Paul,
It’s not that we’re having problems – I value this correspondence – I don’t want to have problems in the future.
All you need to do in order to enable me to send these funds to secure my funds – if that is what you want – is send me a photo.
I am starting to suspect that you are not what you seem.
I have acted in good faith with you – and you have promised me much but delivered nothing.
If this money is real (and I am beginning to doubt it) – I make you this offer… I will give you 40% of it on completion of the transaction. I am so confident now that the money does not exist that I am willing to promise you a share of it – because a share of nothing is nothing. If it does exist I am willing to take that gamble as I will still come out of this deal with a significant amount of unexpected revenue.
If you want to secure your 40% of this deal – and if it is genuine – then send me the photo I have asked for. If you send me this photo I will pay you an advance on this deal because of the insult that my distrust must be.
If you send me this photo I will transfer the $850 you have requested and a $10,000 down payment on your share of the money. This photo is worth $10,000 to you. Either do it – or I’ll know you aren’t genuine. This is the only way I will be convinced to continue in this deal and trust you.
The equation is simple. At this stage I need proof in order to send you, a stranger, $850 of my money in order to secure millions of dollars you have promised me – that I have never seen. It may not exist. I don’t believe that it does. If it did you would send me the photo.
Remember Dr Paul that because this may be insulting to you I have promised you $10,000 of my money, as an advance, when you prove yourself to me. Do other clients pay you like I am promising to? I doubt it.

After this email he rang me. Once I figure out the best way to upload the phone call (I recorded it) I’ll put it here.

The Dr Paul saga

This is a very long post about Dr Paul, my new friend from Ghana. It’s over 3,000 words long.

Feel free to skip it. You have been warned.

Dr Paul is my new friend from Ghana. We have spoken on the phone a number of times. He has a thick African accent and he talks very fast. He tries to reassure me that I have nothing to worry about. Because he will look after everything and make sure I get my money.

Being the less than gullible person that I am I have had to demand some evidence to back up his claims. He has been less than forthcoming.

It might be time for me to try to turn the tables a little. Here are some email highlights…



From the records of outstanding contractors due for payment with the Government of Ghana your name and company was discovered as next on the list of the outstanding contractors who have not received their payments. I wish to inform you that your payment is being processed and will be released to you as soon as you respond to this letter.

Also note that from my record in my file your outstanding contract payment is US$15.7 million dollars (Fifteen Million Seven Hundred Thousand United States Dollar Please re-confirm to me if this is inline with what you have in your record and also re-confirm to me the followings:

1) Your full name.

2) Phone, Fax and Mobile #.

3) Company name, Position and Address.

4) Profession, age and marital status.

5) Any kind of identification

I don’t recall doing any work for the Government of Ghana. This is curious. I also changed my name slightly – you never know what sort of nastiness these people might be capable.

Hi Paul,

Thanks for contacting me. I am confused – are you suggesting that I owe you $15.7 million? That can not be correct.


Nathaniel McIntosh Campbell

He didn’t respond to clarify the situation so I let him know I was no dummy… I may have embelished some details further to continue to further obfuscate my identity.

Dr Paul,

I have reread the wording of your original email. I now understand that you will be paying me $15.7 million.

I am very excited.

Can you advise what steps need to be undertaken for me to claim this money.

The answers, as best I can, to your questions, are as follows:

1) Nathan McIntosh Campbell

2) I don’t have a fax or landline – my mobile number is (my actual number).

3) Company Name: McIntosh Communications, position Director

4) Communications Professional, 42, Married.

5) Unfortunately my wallet was stolen in a home invasion three days ago – I will forward my identification to you when I receive new cards.

Obviously I sound impressive, because Dr Paul wished to continue with this transaction in order to deliver me my money. He seemed nice. He has not, at this point, demanded a share of the money owed to me…

Att: Nathan McIntosh Campbell

Thanks for the mail. We have noted the contents of your mail and we want to inform you that all arrangements have been concluded to deliver the fund to you.

Do note that it is absolutely necessary for you to send to me the nearest airport to your destination any your form of identification to enable the diplomat knows the person he is delivering to. Also the reason we need your nearest airport is to enable the us get freight clearance from Kotoka International Airport Ghana as well as for the Ghana Customs Excise and Preventive Services on your behalf.

This is very important.

Furthermore, you have to note that as soon as the diplomat arrives the nearest airport to your destination, he will call you and then advice you on the exact time he will be coming to your address for the delivery.

Finally, I will advice you to keep this process secret and confidential till the delivery has been made to you to avoid you loosing your funds. I will furnish you with the opening code number of the box because the diplomat will not have access to it except you.

Further information shall be given to you as soon as I hear from you.

Cordially yours,

Dr. Paul Acquah

Governor Bank Of Ghana Accra


That is his phone number. Feel free to call. I haven’t yet – he’s called me a few times. We’ve spoken for about 20 minutes in total. If he calls me again I’ll try to record the conversation. I am obviously very keen to receive this outstanding money – but I am cautious.

Dr Paul,

Thank you for your email. You understand I must approach deals like this with caution.

In my line of work I can not be embroiled in scandalous business dealings. I will need proof of your identity, and it must be demonstrably current.

Are you able to supply a photo of yourself taken today to demonstrate your bonafides? I would suggest holding a piece of paper with a phrase chosen by myself would be an appropriate measure. Could you please produce same – with my favourite Bible verse – John 3:16 – written on a piece of paper – not the verse, just the words “John 3:16” will do.

I will then supply you with the information required to complete the transaction.



I am hopeful that Dr Paul will be the first person to supply me with this photo as requested. He responded with a passport – note it’s not the same one as the version included at the top of this post… but we’ll get to the reason for that shortly…

My dear you have to understand me that i dont want to make you not to get you fund. so my good friend please as you ask me my id you can see it attach to show you that am not telling you liar.Am looking forward to hearing form you soon. Cordially yours,

Dr. Paul Acquah

This was simply not good enough for a cautious guy like me… Particularly because the name on the passport is different to Dr Paul’s name. Something doesn’t seem right…

I chose not to notice the discrepency at this stage – because this was when I got my first long phone call.

Dr Paul,

Thank you for your phone call. Though it was very late at night in my country (and I was asleep) – it put my mind at ease somewhat.

My problem is this, my great uncle was once caught up in an international transaction where things were not as they seemed. Our family has learned from this incident.

I believe you to be true to your word – but I must insist that you provide me with an undoctored photo holding a piece of paper with the words I requested (John 3:16) written on them.

If you are who you say you are I can’t see why this would be a problem. Anybody can scan and send a passport photo or doctor it to make it look legitimate. Very few people could fake the photo I’ve asked you to produce in such short notice.

I am ready, and willing, to proceed with our deal once I get the photo.

Dr Paul obviously decided that this was the time for him to strike – and he asked me for $850 via Western Union.

Thanks for the mail and the information that you supplied.

Please note that I have been able to secure the Ghana Customs Excise and Preventive Services Clearance for your consignment examination and confirmation for freight to you from the Kotoka International Airport Ghana.

They said that you are required to pay the sum of $850 only being cost of freight of the consignment before the diplomat can come over to Australia for the delivery. all you have to do to try you best do send this money because diplomat is waiting for you before he will come to you door.

This money can be sent through western union money transfer or money gram to: NAME;Mr. Emmanuel Onyekwere

ADDRESS;Accra Ghana

As soon as you send the money do send the Western Union details to me via email so that we can take the payment information to the Airport to enable them collect the money. my good friend one thing i want to assure you that i will not let you down. Remember that the diplomat will travel from Ghana to Australia to deliver the fund to you the moment this payment is received.

I will be waiting to hear from you today. i wish you nice day.

Cordially yours,

Dr. Paul Acquah

We spoke on the phone and I asked if it was possible for this $850 to be taken out of the amount he apparently owes me. For some reason it was not. I started to get a little agitated.

Hi Dr Paul,

I’m thrilled that you’ve got the documentation. I really am. But do you think I’m stupid?

You’re treating me like an idiot. I have asked for one piece of proof – and you have refused to provide it.

I can’t understand why you’re finding it so difficult to provide a photo. I will not be transferring the money without it – but once I have it I will make the transfer.

Has the diplomat booked his flights yet? Do we have a deadline?

I expect your photo to arrive as soon as is practical. If you wish to call me to discuss please do so at a time appropriate for fitting in with my schedule – and not at an unearthly hour in the morning.



He tried to calm me down…


Thank you very much for your mail and explanations so far. my good friend i want to assure that the photo i send to you is my photo which my inter nation passport. mygood friend i don’t no how i can explain my self to you again. all i want to assure that i will never let you down by deliver this fund to you, because i see you that you are good person that makes me being try my best all this days to see that i get all document for you.

my good friend don’t worry just go and do the payment before end of this week you fund will touch you hand. my good friend this money that coming will help you so much include you family, just be liver me that i will do it for you. Am looking forward to hearing form you soon.

Yours Friend

Dr Paul

But I was not having any of that…

Dr Paul,

Thank you for calling again last night. I assume the call I missed an hour later was also from you – I’m sorry, I was asleep and didn’t hear my phone.

Please understand that while my tone on the phone can be harsh – I require an element of trust before entering into any business arrangement.

I do understand the urgency involved in this transaction and your need for a firm commitment.

I believe that the passport is your passport – all I require is a secondary piece of confirmation featuring your photo, but one that could not possible be faked.

This is why I have asked you to produce a photo holding my favourite bible verse. If you can not do this then I can not trust you.

It is that simple.

Don’t bother calling me again if you can’t meet my conditions.

I would have thought this task rather simple when considered in the context of a multimillion dollar transaction.

Rest assured, I will look after my end of the deal once the transaction gets underway.

But I must have this photo immediately.

You will then receive your $850 transfer.

I look forward to your response.

He sought to clarify exactly why he needs this money…


Thank you very much for your mail and explanations so are you today. my good friend i have explain to you my self time to time but you did not understand me, my dear you are not give me this money to eat but i want to use to help you for your fund. once again am not eat you money. you $850 is not in my side but one thing i want to assure you that if you want to collect you fund you do what i told you to do, but if you go head send me saying many things it will not helping you to collect this fund. my good friend is not only you the person that will have send there fund since this week. but because of love i have on you makes me live all am doing in my office help you..

my dear all this thing you are saying it will not help. my dear am not use you money to do any thing if you like send the money if you did not like don’t not send that is only business because i have explain my self to you but you do want to understand me. as am talking to you now very arrangement have do to deliver this fund to you but you have make very thing to be prolong. so my dear try to understand that am help you am not come to scam you money or eat you money but if you go head say many thing it will not help you.

Am looking forward to hearing form you soon.

yours Friend

Dr Paul

This is getting nowhere. Where is my photo… and who eats money anyway?

Dr Paul,

Until you provide me the proof I have asked for I will not believe you. These are just words you are using to persuade me.

I don’t think I ever suggested you would “eat” the money. I will not send you the money until you send me a second photo, with the sign I have requested.

You are either not understanding what I am saying – or not listening.

Produce a photo or I will not believe that you are who you say you are.

We had a pretty heated phone call after this – where I demanded the proof. I told him to put up or shut up. And I played my trump card. He claimed to be Dr Paul Acquah – and yet he sent me a passport for an Emmanuel Onyekwere as his proof – and asked me to send money to the same name.

I smelt a rat. After the phone call he sent me this email:


Thank you very once again. my dear you are not understand me too. my dear i live all am doing in my office try my best to help you but you do want to understand me. my dear i have proof my self to you but you do want to understand me. my dear don’t no what i will do for you again.. if you like i can send me the photo of you fund you can see you by you self. my dear you are make very thing to be prolong just do what i told you to do and live all this you are saying because it will not help you out by get this fund. i have explain my self to you but you do want to understand me. my dear if you did not want this fund just tell me because i have many people like you i live all their fund and look only your but you don’t want to understand friend try follow my word you will not going to have any problem.Am looking forward to hearing form you soon.

Yours Friend

Dr Paul”

And I sent him this one… I heard nothing from him for a number of days afterwards…

Dr Paul.

Here are the facts. I will not be sending you the money for this transfer until you clear up the following and provide the proof I have asked for.

1. You have sent me a passport for Mr Emmanuel Onyekwere.

2. You have asked me to transfer money to the same person.

3. You have phoned me three times claiming to be Dr Paul Acquah.

4. You have sent me no identification to back up your claim to be Dr Paul Acquah.

5. I have asked repeatedly for a photo of you, holding a sign, as evidence of your legitimacy.

You have refused to provide it. On these basis I can only assume that you are either: 1. A terrible, terrible con man who has no idea how to run your own business.

2. Stupid.

3. Confused.

4. Trying to cover up your real identity with a cover story because of the dangers involved in assisting me to access my money.

5. Someone with multiple personality disorder.

6. I might be mistaken.

If it is option 4 – then I must assure you that I will not reveal the details of our transaction to anybody – but I must insist that you provide me with the photograph before we go any further.

You are sailing dangerously close to missing out on the 30% share of the funds that I was going to provide you – and I certainly won’t be transferring this money to you until you provide a photograph as requested.

He finally replied.

Thank you for your mail and sorry for my late response. I want you to understand that the identification for Emmanuel happens to be what I felt you requested for, based on the fact that he is the one to receive the money.

But nevertheless, I will be sending you my own personal identification as soon as I get to my office, as am writing this from the house at this moment due to the week end.

Still the same, I want you to understand that this transaction is legally binded and have absolutely nothing to do with what you might be thinking, so do have such though deleted from your mind. Thank you for your understanding.


I started to wonder if the barrier to getting my photo might be the Bible reference – so I asked him for something else.

“Hi Dr Paul,

I trust you had a good weekend – I look forward to receiving both your passport and a second photo corroborating your passport – a photo of you holding a piece of paper with the words “Robot in Disguise” would be suitable.

I saw Transformers 2 last night. I enjoyed it.



And he sent me the passport photo included at the top of this post. I’m still waiting for my photo. He’s still waiting for his money. We are at an impasse.

Who wants to be a millionaire

I mentioned my impending economic influx the other day. I have, in the last three days – won a Chinese Lottery (courtesy of Toyota), been approached by a man from Ghana (who I’ve since spoken to on the phone a couple of times) to take care of some mysterious money, and been offered a share of $15 million from a merchant banker in the UK.

Good times.

I am determined to get my John 3:16 photo by any means – so I also created a new email account and went back to one of the scammers with an offer to take part in a global photography shoot for a Christian organisation.

Here’s what I sent to the British banker…

1st Email

Thankyou for your email dated Monday 29/06/2009.

Unfortunately, at this time, I am unable to help out with your transaction.

I am far too busy with my business to be able to help at this time.

I am busy with a major global contract – and you may actually be able to assist me. I have been contracted to find appropriate modelling talent from around the world to take part in a photo shoot for a major Christian coalition. The budget is large and models will be paid 10,000 GBP for the ongoing rights to the photos.

I am looking for people from countries around the world to participate – would you know any suitable talent in Scotland?

Please ask them to contact me directly. They do not have to be traditional "model" type people – we want, wherever possible, to feature normal people.
Please advise if you may know of anybody.


2nd Email

Hi Steven, I just wanted to touch base with you after the email I sent you a couple of days ago. As I mentioned, I am looking for people to appear in a photo shoot I am conducting around the globe. I may not have been completely clear with my instructions or details.

We want to produce a montage of images featuring faces of people from around the globe holding placards featuring popular bible verses. It doesn’t matter if you don’t believe the Bible – we just want a mix of nationalities and demographics.

We are paying 10,000 pounds to each model for the image rights and ongoing commercial reproduction of these images. If you are interested could you send a sample photo to this address including yourself holding such a placard.

Feel free to pass it on to your friends and family. We are looking for many models so your assistance would be appreciated. We would be happy to consider a finders fee.



I’ve engaged with correspondence with him from a new email account I set up for that very purpose. He has responded there, but not to my requests. Curious.

The Toyota deal comes with a free car – but I also have to set up a bank account in China – this will no doubt be where I have to fork out dollars.

The UN also contacted me about some sort of payment – but the account belonging to the UN staff member has since been closed. He did, however, ask me to contact a Reverend. So I did.

Dear Reverend Hedges,
Greetings in the name of the Lord.
Our friend Captain James Williams has contacted me regarding the release of funds owing in my name.
He has asked me to contact you with some odd details. I trust that you, as an ordained minister of the Lord, will be able to allay my concerns when it comes to the details requested.
Why do you require information about my home equity situation, why is a PO Box not acceptable? These seem like strange requests.
I am confident that representatives of the UN will always act in good faith.
I look forward to hearing from you so that I can conclude this transaction as soon as possible.
The money will be most welcome by the Christian charities I intend to support.
I trust, brother, that you will respond promptly.

I will share my adventures with my “phone-a-friend” – Dr Paul – upon their conclusion. I’ve wasted about 15 minutes of his time and hopefully cost him some telephone credit in the process. I have asked him to provide a John 3:16 photo.

But my friend Mr Chan has to provide something slightly different.

Thank you for your email. Things are much clearer now. I look forward to receiving the funds – what makes you think that having received the totality of the funds I will pay you your share?

That seems very trusting.

Do we need to enter some sort of contractual agreement to ensure I don’t keep all of it?

I would like to receive some sort of evidence that you are "on the level" – perhaps a photo of you holding a note to me would be appropriate, along with a copy of some identification. I believe this is the best way to approach "proof".

Two photos that corroborate your identity along with something that proves you are responding to my request (the note) seems like the easiest way to prove your identity.
It needs to be a photo that you won’t be able to find readily on the Internet. So the note should contain something that would only have been produced at my request.

I watched Transformers 2 last night. Perhaps you could hold a sign that says "Robot in Disguise".

I look forward to receiving your next correspondence. Please forward through the requirements for setting up an account with a private bank.

I’m hopeful the Transformers theme will be easier to accommodate for these unbelieving heathen.

All good things…

Sadly it appears the game is up. Michel Robert is not playing my games any longer. Or so it would seem.

He sent me an obscure email – with the subject line YES A JOKER.

I told him in no uncertain terms that I was not. And he responded:


I responded, unwilling to give up, requesting the photo…

How can I send you the money?

I need your photo.

Get back to me with the details for the transfer and the photo as soon
as possible.

He wasn’t receptive to my response…


I smelled a rat. Perhaps his uncles had caught up with him. I had to be sure…

You need to get me the photo. As soon as possible. And I will send you the money – you are acting strangely. Prove to me that you are for real. I have $10,000 to wire you to get you out of the country and into safety. BUT I MUST SEE THAT YOU ARE OK. That your uncles haven’t taken over your account. AND THAT YOU ARE PREPARED TO FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS.

His response took me by surprise…


12 BP 4010 ABIDJAN 12



He had done no such thing. So I called him out on this lie…

“No you didn’t. I’ve checked my emails – I have no record of that request.

I don’t think you are Michel.

I think you are his uncles – and I think you’ve killed him. I am going
to go to the police without proof that you are really Michel. I
understand you are under stress and might not be keeping track of the
emails you send.

I will send you 10,000 when I get the photo. Not before. Otherwise I
will go to the police, and the lawyer, and the security company and
inform them that Michel Robert has been murdered by his uncles. Run
away uncles. While you have the chance.

I will come for you – you have killed my Michel.”

And he brushed me off…

” which instruction do you want me to follow?. I told you how important it is for me to leave here but you are asking me to send you photo. in the first place, i have started wondering if you are telling me the truth because it seems you are lying to me or you may want to play with me. i do not have money to snap the picture and dont ever ask me to send you the picture again because i have no means to snap the photo. if you dont want to help me, please go with you $10,000 and i dont need it. not intrested in your games”

Keeping the dream alive

Those of you worried about my safety while I play with the heart and mind of a vulnerable young man in Cote D’Ivoire who is trying to steal all my money should take some solace from this websiteor this one

This is my goal people. To one day receive a larger than life Commodore 64 Keyboard in the mail. In this case I’ll settle for a John 3:16 photo and a good chance to reprimand the toerag for trying to steal my money (while also coming clean that I’m not a 57 year old businessman)… that seems the ethically appropriate thing to do.

My African friend has withdrawn a little since I told him that I would have difficulty raising funds without his cooperation. But I’ll keep you posted.

Choose your own adventure

This whole scambaiting thing is amusing – but I’d like to throw it open to the rest of you for some input.

This whole thing feels a bit like a Choose Your Own Adventure book – I used to skip to the end, find the ending I wanted, and work my way backwards – but that’s cheating.

I have a few ideas for how I can try to go about this business (once I get my John 3:16 picture) – and I’d live votes from you, my audience, and perhaps suggestions… here are my options.

a) Get indignant with Michel and point out that his actions are not consistent with his doctrine.
b) Try to engage further in a theological discussion on baptism – pointing out that baptism does not in fact save Michel, only repentance and trusting in Jesus will do that – and repentance does not look like swindling foreigners out of their money.
c) Continue stringing Michel along for as long as possible asking outrageous questions in the hope he’ll continue to provide comedic gold.
d) Try to turn the owner of the Secure Deposit Company corrupt – Michel insisted I not mention the money hidden in his secure deposit box – perhaps I should.
e) Tell the lawyer I think Michel is trying to swindle me and ask for advice about how to end the transaction.
f) Actually pay the money – or pretend to, and have it stolen by pirates…
g) Slowly but surely catch on that this is a scam and act hurt that Michel has betrayed his “daddy Campbell”…

Any other ideas? Any other questions you’d like Michel to answer?

The three esthes…

Are of course “Security, Security, Security…”, which takes on new meaning when you’re dealing with dangerous international pirates. 

The security company has contacted me to help facilitate the transfer of the safety deposit box (stashed with secret cash) into my possession. Their email is all in caps – and it pretty much makes your eyes bleed. It started like this:





Then, I was to contact some lawyer who suffers from a clear case of nominal determinism…

16 BP 532 ABIDJAN 16 





What a name. Oh well. I wrote back to the security company.

Whoa Dr Duke, ease up on the caps lock. It makes your correspondence difficult to read.

I am very happy you responded to me. I wonder if you can do me a favour, as we are about to enter into this significant transaction.

Would it be possible for me, as executor and legal owner of this deposit, to arrange for my ward – Michel Robert – to have some personal time with the container. He has some personal items to place in the container, and some to remove. He must have access to the box in complete private before it is released to my care.

I have copied Michel in to this email so that he knows you have my authorisation to allow him to access the box.

Please write to me when this has been completed so I will stop worrying about this transaction.

In the meantime I will contact this lawyer.

The nearest airport to me is the Brisbane International Airport in Australia.

Yours Faithfully,

And then to the Lawyer, where I planted a seed for potentially trying to turn him against himself (in the guise of Michel).

Dr Mr Huissier De Justice,

Wow, that’s a great name for a lawyer. Did you change it by deed poll? Can I change mine too…

Actually, that is an entirely unrelated matter to my email.

I am about to remove a safety deposit box from your country and have it transferred to mine. I am told I need some paperwork from you in order to facilitate this.

You’re a lawyer, so I’ll be honest with you, I have some concerns about this transaction. Is it normal in Cote D’Ivor for a man’s uncles to be trying to kill him? My poor ward Michel Robert is terrified by these men who are clearly dangerous. I worry about his safety. Can you reassure me that he will be ok. He wants me to act quickly – and I’m afraid that some of my business commitments in Australia prevent me from engaging in this transaction as quickly as he requires.

In the meantime – I need to secure a change of ownership authority as I am taking ownership of the consignment from my friend Michel’s deceased father.

I trust you will act with discretion on this matter. Can I trust you? I would hope that I can and ask that you keep my concerns to yourself and do not mention them to the Security company.

Yours faithfully,

Jonathan “Nathan” Campbell

An answer on baptism

Anyone following my current scammer saga will know I’ve been pressing friend Michel on his position on baptism. Today he answered, but it wasn’t enough. I am seeking clarification for your edification. Here is his response:

Dearest Daddy Nathan,
How are you doing today. I am still really dont understand what you mean by baptism but I beleive baptism is a sign of forgiveness of sin. Everything I told you about me and my inheritance is truth and nothing but the truth, god is my witness. As I said earlier, I do not have any money with me now and that was why I am very worried to make sure we claim the consignment from the security company so that you will send me some money immediately you receive the consignment and deposit the money into your account. I will provide you the pictures holding a card bearing the words “John 3:16 as a sign of my trust and confidence in you but that should be when you receive the consignment and send me some money because at the moment, I dont have money to pay a photographer considering the fact my present situation here. Please be rest assured that the consignment will delivered to you as soon as the change of ownership are made in your name as my foreign trustee.

No money to pay a photographer. This is unacceptable to me. I am very concerned. Perhaps friend Michel is trying to, how do you say, “take me for a ride…”


Thankyou for responding. I was starting to worry. So much that I did a little research on the internet after my friend’s warnings. 
I am a little concerned. I would hate to be caught up in some sort of plot to steal my money. But I believe that you, a Christian, and my son in Christ Jesus, would not lie to me. This is why I ask for this photo. If I know that you are prepared to find a photographer to produce a photo on my request I will know that you are legitimate. 
Thank you for answering my question about baptism – I’m sorry it confused you. I was asking about your view on whether children should be baptised – I believe this is a key theological issue. It will be easier for me to trust you if I know you are a true believer. So can you tell me what you think on that matter? And can you also tell me what is your favourite verse from the Bible. 
I know you’ve said you don’t have any money at the moment – but I have an idea. I will write to the security company to organise a viewing for you of the box (on my behalf). When you are there you should be able to remove some cash. 
My accountant monitors my spendings closely and I do not think I can send you any spare money at this stage. I will need to find some excuse to withdraw a significant amount to help you out. 
I will contact the security company – who have also asked me to contact a lawyer – and wait for your answers and the photo. I can’t stress how important this photo is to me. I don’t want to leave you in danger – but equally I don’t want to be caught out in some sort of international fraud. I need this photo.
Now, I must go, I have a letter to write to the security company.

My New Friend part 2

Michel Roberts just rang me on the telephone at work. Which surprised me somewhat. He’s definitely a man.

He rang to see if I’d read his latest email. And to tell me that his life is in danger. I did read his email, and I don’t really care. Here are some highlights from the email.

“I want you to understand that I had bestowed my hope in you believing that you will not cheat me or seat on my fund once the security company deliver the consignment to your care. Therefore,you are to impose love, trust and confidence in me so that we shall achieve our aim. Mostly is trust because without trust that’s mean we are not making any progress,I have the believe that you are a God sent to me and also a God fearing person, and I think it will be nice for us to handle this by both of us because I don’t want someone else to know about the consignment in the security company.Please my dear lets keep the secret between us.”

“Remember that you promised to help me and you also said that you will stand by me. Note that our relationship can not only be built on money but it has got a lot to do with trust and love for people. How can we build this trust? Should we be binded by a contract bond which will be legally signed and sealed in the law court here in this country to avoid cheats from the both of us before we proceed? I need your opinion on this. And bear in mind that I can never do anything that will hurt your heart. It’s a promise. I assure you that this project is 100% risk free and legal, you will not have any problem in assisting me in this project as everything is legal and risk free.”

And here’s my response.

Thank you once again for your timely response. I feel they would be quicker if you wrote slightly shorter emails.

I notice that you did not answer my question from my last email. As I said, the biggest reason I have for continuing to do business with you is your religion. I have a personal rule about not doing business with anybody who does not fear the Lord. You did not answer my question about baptism. Does this mean you are in favour of baptising children?

I was writing this when you made your phone call. Please do not call me by phone in the future – I can not talk about this matter in front of my colleagues. We will have to conduct our communication by email or I will not be continuing our transaction.

I would like you to send me the details for the security company.

Thank you for your call. It is nice to know you are a real person – I have heard of people having money stolen in situations like this – so I believe it is important that we establish this trust.

I have another question for you to answer to help me trust you. Do you love Jesus?

My goal is to preach the gospel to this scammer. Lets see how far I get.